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“21 Most Important
Keys to Getting Your
Ex Back”
By: Ryan Ha
All rights reserved.
Copyright © Ryan Hall and PullYourExBack.com
o part o! this "ook may "e reproduced or transmitted in any !orm or "y any
means# electrical or mechanical# including photocopying and recording# or
"y any in!ormation storage or retrieval system $ithout permission in $riting
!rom the author.

'his "ook is $ritten !or in!ormational purposes only. 'he author has made every
e!!ort to make sure the in!ormation is complete and accurate. All attempts have
"een made to veri!y in!ormation at the time o! this pu"lication and the authors do
not assume any responsi"ility !or errors# omissions# or other interpretations o!
the su"(ect matter. 'he pu"lisher and author shall have neither lia"ility nor
responsi"ility to any person or entity $ith respect to any loss or damage caused
or alleged to "e caused directly or indirectly "y this "ook.

“"o not c#ase t#em at any cost”
'he very reason $hy your ex $alked a$ay !rom you means that they are
looking !or some space...)t doesn*t really mean that they $ant to get rid o!
you completely. 'hey are (ust seeking some space to get their o$n
emotions in order. 'he "est thing to do during the initial phases o! the
"reakup is to let them have their $ay.

'rust me+ othing $ould "other them more than the !act that you have
already accepted the "reakup and decided to move on.

“$reten% t#at you #a&e area%y mo&e% on”

Even i! you haven*t you must pretend that you have already moved on. 'he
last thing your ex $ould ever expect you to do is to move on so early. ,ee
the !unny thing is that even i! they did dump you they still have
expectations !rom you.

And the "est $ay to make them desire you again is not to !ul!ill their
expectations....-hen their expectations $ould not "e met they $ould
al$ays "e a "it distur"ed due to $hich they $ould seek your attention yet

“"emonstrate t#at you #a&e mo&e% on
using t#e no contact rue”
Please re!er to the main "ook to understand the no contact rule in detail.
-ell the no contact rule simply means that you $ould avoid all sorts o!
contact $ith your ex until the time you are no longer emotionally needy.

-hen you success!ully practice the no contact rule...You are more or less
letting your ex kno$ that you have already moved on and that $ould "e the
time $hen they $ould start !eeling that they are starting to lose you.

“Insta t#e )eeing o) oss in your ex*s
%o you kno$ that humans $ant things they can*t easily have. 'he very
!act that it*s not easy to have you no$ $ould drive them to try t$ice as hard
and at the same time they $ould !ear losing you completely.

-hen you constantly chase your ex# you are letting them kno$ that you
need them# $hich gives them the !eeling that they already have you. As
long as they kno$ that# they $ould never even "other to get you "ack.

But the moment they come to reali/e that you are starting to or have
already moved on...'hey start !eeling that they are starting to lose you no$
although they did not have the same !eeling "e!ore.

'he very !ear o! losing something you already had is a very strong driver#
$hich $ould motivate them to pursue you once again. )t is the same !ear
one gets $hen he kno$s that he is a"out to lose his (o" due to $hich he
does $hat he can to retain it.

“,on&ince yourse)!!!-ot your ex”

0ost people try to convince their ex into liking them once again...1et me
assure you o! something. You can never convince# !orce or pull your ex into
liking you once again. 'he more you $ork to$ards making your ex like you
the !urther a$ay you $ould end up pushing them.

,o does this mean they $ould never change their mind a"out you. -ell

Your ex $ould change the moment you change. Yes+ )t*s really this simple.
'he only person you have to convince in yoursel! and no one else. 'he
moment you accept the "reakup and stop pushing against it you $ill
automatically start doing $hat3s re4uired to "e done in order to get your ex

'he only person you have to $ork on is yoursel! and not your ex.

“Get ri% o) a t#e attraction kiers”
eediness and desperation are kno$n to "e the t$o "iggest attraction
killers $hich $ould make it extremely hard !or you to get your ex "ack.

As long as you demonstrate high levels o! neediness and desperation#
your ex $ould al$ays try to avoid you as much as possi"le. By "eing
needy# you are indirectly letting them kno$ that you are the one $ho is
desperate to get them "ack.

Al$ays remem"er that in a relationship the one $ho is needier than the
other never gets to decide or have control. You $ill al$ays "e at the mercy
o! your ex*s decision as long as you act needy.

“Your c#ances o) getting your ex 0ack are
%irecty proportiona to t#e e&e o) your

-ho ever is the least emotional in the relationship and more in control o!
their emotions al$ays get to have the upper hand. Your success or !ailure
at getting your ex "ack $ould completely depend upon ho$ $ell you deal
$ith your o$n emotional challenges.

“"on*t keep your ex on top o) your priority

You are de!initely not on the right track i! your ex is on the top o! your
priority list at the moment. 'hey are keeping you (ust as an option there!ore
$hy are you keeping them as your main priority.

%on*t give your ex the type o! treatment they don*t really deserve. You
should never give respect unless you are getting the same in return.

“You 4i #a&e to get o&er t#em to get
t#em 0ack”
-ell this might seem like a very "i/arre concept "ut the !act is that in order
to get your ex "ack you must !irst get over them $hich means you must get
rid o! your emotional neediness.

As long as you are emotionally reactive and have a strong emotional
attachment to$ards getting them "ack you $ill al$ays struggle.

“Keep your options open”

ever depend on your ex too much...%o not put all your hope in (ust getting
them "ack. 5o out and meet some ne$ people. You $ill "e pleasantly
surprised $hat you have "een missing out on.

“"on*t keep any expectations”

2ne o! the ma(or reasons $hy people get hurt is "ecause they never get
their expectations !ul!illed.....'here $ill "e times $hen you might come to
kno$ that your ex has started dating again.....'his can "e extremely

But once you don*t expect anything !rom your ex# you are automatically
stripping your ex o! all the po$er to hurt you. You $ill get to a point $here
your ex*s actions $ould not determine the $ay you !eel.

“6#e #ungry %on*t get )e%”
'his simply means that people $ho are the most desperate never get $hat
they desire or have to $ork extremely hard !or it. 'he higher the level o!
your desperation is the lesser your chances $ould "e o! getting your ex

'he only $ay out o! this is to "e secure and non6needy. 'he one $ho has
more al$ays gets more. 'his is the reason $hy they al$ays say the poor
get poorer and the rich get richer.

“7n%erstan% t#at you %esire your ex 0ut
%on*t nee% t#em”

'his is one concept most people have a hard time understanding. You
must understand that you desire to "e $ith your ex "ut this does not mean
that you can*t survive $ithout them.

-hat3s the $orst thing# $hich can ever happen in li!e. According to many#
it*s death. And people get over even the death o! a loved one there!ore
$hat makes you say that you $ill never get over your ex.

“8#en your ex s#o4s interest1 Become a
5etting your ex interested is only hal! the "attle $on...'he next thing you
must do is to act like a challenge. As long as your ex has to $ork !or your
attention they $ould al$ays try extra hard to get it.

You al$ays value the things you pay !or more than the things you get !or

“Eit#er you contro t#e situation or it
contros you”
'his means that not taking action right a$ay $ould only mean massive
pain !or you...,itting at one place all day long thinking a"out your ex $ould
only make you !urther misera"le. You must !ollo$ the plan mentioned in the
main 7Pull your ex "ack8 manual right a$ay.

You only have t$o options under this situation...You either get to take
action and control the situation or give up and let the situation treat you like
a victim.

%o not choose temporary convenience !or long6term pain. Be strong and
stick to the plan.

“-e&er 4orry a0out competition”

)! you kno$ that your ex is dating someone else then it can trigger a lot o!
insecurities $here you might get strong urges to get in touch $ith them
again or even spy on them at times. You see this only means that you still
have insecurity issues.

1et me tell you that as long as you maintain high levels o! sel!6control and
sho$ your ex that you don*t really care $ho they are $ith the ta"les $ill
turn $ithin seconds.

)! you accidentally run into your ex $hile they are on a date then you do not
avoid them or get highly agitated over the !act that they are $ith someone
else. ,mile...And greet them and their date nicely. 0ake sure that you
seem very calm and happy "ut make sure you don*t spend too much time
$ith them. 9ust give your greetings and make an early exit.

You see $hen you don*t really react negatively it $ould give your ex the
indication that you have already accepted the "reakup and pro"a"ly
moved on. o$ even though they dumped you this $ould never "e too
easy !or them to s$allo$.

'hey $ould still think $hat made you get over them so !ast... And this very
thought $ould keep on spinning in their head day and night.

“Be extremey #appy 0ut %on*t te anyone

'his seems to $ork very $ell $hen you keep in touch $ith your ex*s
!riends....'he "est $ay to dou"le the in!luence is to let your ex kno$ a"out
your reality through a third person "ecause that $ay they $ould not !ind it
hard to "elieve.

Act extremely happy as i! you have !ound a totally ne$ li!e and make it
o"vious that you are happy. 'his $ould really get your ex thinking and
he:she $ill try to !igure out the real reason "ehind your happiness.

You see it $ould get them highly curious to kno$ $hat3s the real reason
"ehind your happiness...'hey $ould get insecure thinking that may"e you
have !ound someone ne$ and that person is the reason !or your

“-e&er 0e 9ust )rien%s 4it# your ex”

'his is one mistake a lot o! people end up making....2!ten times they "reak
the no contact rule and get in touch $ith their ex too early. 'hey might get
into a conversation $ith you once again "ut this doesn3t really mean that
they $ant to "e "ack $ith you or they like you the $ay they used to "e!ore.

'hey might ask you to (ust "e !riends and almost every person out there
tends to !all !or this....You see $hen they ask you to "e (ust !riends it
means that they $ant to keep you around (ust as a "ackup plan $hile they
go out and look !or "etter people.

You see you $ould "e stuck in the !riend3s /one $hile they go out and date
ne$ people.

%o not "e a "ack up or a second option !or your ex...the only $ay to get
out o! this is to !ollo$ the no contact rule yet again.

“7n%erstan% t#at it*s not an o0igation )or
your ex to come 0ack to you”
0ost people get highly disappointed $hen they don*t really $itness any
real reaction !rom their ex a!ter the "reakup. ;nderstand that it*s an option
!or your ex and not an a"solute necessity.

0ost people try to !orce or convince their ex to come "ack to them "ut you
see this is like trying to sell them something they don*t really $ant to "uy.
Ho$ do you !eel $hen a salesperson at your door keeps sho$ing up
everyday trying to sell you stu!! you don*t $ant to "uy...-ouldn3t you avoid
him as much as possi"le. You see your (o" here is to make sure you don*t
end up "eing like that salesman.

)nstead o! $orking on your ex# you must $ork on yoursel!. 5et your o$n
sel! in the right order and the rest o! the things $ill !all in the right order as

-ork on making yoursel! more attractive and your ex $ill automatically "e
attracted to$ards you once again.

“Ha&e no )ear o) oss”
A!ter the "reakup# most people !eel that they $ent through a "ig loss and
they might struggle to deal $ith it !or the rest o! their li!e.

1et me ask you this 4uestion6 %id you come to this planet $ith your ex.
-ell o"viously no. You see $hen you $ere not "orn $ith them you can
easily live $ithout them. Ho$ can you lose something you never had in the
!irst place.

9ust remem"er that this !eeling o! loss is only temporary and it $ill go a$ay
$ith time. -hen you have no !ear o! loss...'hen you have nothing to
lose...And $hen you have# nothing to lose you $ouldn3t really $orry much
a"out getting your ex "ack "ecause emotionally you have already moved

'his is the time $hen you $ill "e in the position o! po$er and $ould have
greater chances o! getting your ex "ack.

“$oints to stick on t#e 4a”
6 8,pend more time looking !or ans$ers than crying over the pro"lem.8

6 8'emporary pain $ill ensure li!etime gain.8
6 7You $ill have to do uncom!orta"le things right no$ to ensure li!elong

6 7%on*t let your emotions dictate your actions.8

6 71earn to make it happen rather than let it happen.8

6 7You $ill have to risk something to gain something. You $ill have to risk
losing your ex in order to gain him "ack.8

6 75etting your ex "ack $ould mean relie! "ut not peace o! mind.8

6 71earn !rom your past mistakes instead o! !eeling guilty over it.8

6 7'he one*s $ho don*t do $hat they need to do $ill al$ays su!!er.8

6 7Have high expectations !rom yoursel! and not others.8

Al$ays remem"er that getting your ex "ack is all a"out doing the right
things at the right times even $hen you don*t !eel like doing it.

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