Can You Keep a Secret
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“Can You Keep a Secret?” “Sure!” you say, but my Pop used to claim the only way three-folks can keep an important secret is – if Two of them are dead! OK, I admit it - I am a genetic and trained Contrarian (law school does that for people). When I read scholarly reports or listen to brilliant folks try to explain their scientific research - two opinions bubble up in my tiny brain. First, “So What?” (like WIITM – What’s In It for Me?). Second, “Who Cares?” – meaning if it’s NOT relevant to my own interests – Go-Fly-A-Kite! My best friend calls me a Miscreant – I had to look it up – it means evil, a villain, and depraved. Comes from Latin meaning, Mis (not) and Credent - to be believed. Cool. What’s Secrets This week I finished a book called The Divided Mind, John D. Sarno, M.D. at NYU Medical Center. He is a lecturer to medical students plus physicians, and has a private practice for patients. Bottom line: the medical community does not believe in nor practice, Psychosomatic Medicine. Dr. Sarno says there is an epidemic of mindbody disorders because doctors and hospitals push surgery and drugs, and ignore the research about the origin of most illnesses. Psycho is mind, and somatic equals body. So? After finishing his book and researching his arguments, I’m a believer. In what? We have serious pain and disability because it is our defense mechanisms against our repressed emotions. Folks would rather suffer years of backpain or carpal tunnel syndrome, surgery and pills, than deal with their scary emotional issues. Second Book Speed Readers are never intimidated by a bunch of books to read and analyze. We own a secret that instill self-esteem and confidence. It is called a RasterMaster, a handheld laser pacer that trains our eyes to at least triple (3x) our learning time, and doubles (2x) our attention, concentration and memory. Not for reading novels, just text. Simultaneously, I finished “Emotional Intelligence”, by Daniel Goleman. It is 15 years old classic about the meaning of “smart”. He documents research that IQ aint all of it. Goleman explains why feelings are the hidden persuaders that produce decisions and behavior 80% of the time. Don’t snicker yet, he opens the door to understanding our Nonconscious mind and
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how to influence, persuade and convince folks. Fact: it’s not the Valedictorians who run the world, it is the socially intelligent (middle-level) graduates who become CEOs and win the big bucks. His follow up books, Social Intelligence and Ecological Intelligence expand his ideas that using our Left-Hemisphere (Consciousness) alone are not enough to make it in the Knowledge Economy. If you read Social Intelligence, you cannot ignore his findings about getting promotions, personal relationships, and happiness. It opens your eyes and changes your mind about yourself, and everybody else too. Relationships And Survival Wanna predict your odds of living or dying? Longevity is based on genes at least 50%, but Social Relationships “improve your odds of survival by 50%”. Who says? Brigham Young University, lead authors professors Lunstad and Smith. Google: the journal PLoS Medicine, July 28, 2010. Get this: friends, colleagues and relatives raise your statistical chance to hang out alive and well about 50%. The researchers show that lack of a safety net of people who care about you, is a risk factor for death. They use the word “social” endlessly so I looked in up in the dictionary. It’s Latin for partner, companion and comrade. Wait. Social is our life, welfare and relations with folks in the community. Does Instant Messaging count? Some scientists believe Not having a social life is worse than smoking, obesity, drugs and alcohol, and being a couch potato. “Bad” means it’ll kill you early. My friend’s Mother divorced and married seven-times, his sister, nine-times. Is it because they like to socialize? This report followed the subjects for seven and a half years and covered 148 previous studies. Maybe it is a kind word, a pat on the back, even tickling. These gestures add meaning to our lives. Do you believe this? When we take responsibility for folks (let them in our lives) we find a sense of purpose which translates to taking better care of ourselves. Last gem from the professors: this survival effect applies across all ages, not just old folks. Relationships are a safety net providing an additional level of protection. Goleman in his Social Intelligence, cites 18 separate studies to indicate powerful links between Social Connectivity and Mortality. That’s ‘mors’ from Latin, meaning Death. Don’t scratch your head and complain about all your jerky friends and relatives and wish you could sell at a discount, they help improve your odds of survival by 50%.
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Money And Happiness Social rank is where you are economically in your community, at work, and among your relatives. Don’t say you don’t know because we all keep track of social standing, it is the human scorecard for happiness. So what Dinero (casho) makes us happy only if it makes us richer than our neighbors or peers. The raise at work or winning the Lotto counts emotionally only if it differentiates us from our work colleagues, neighbors or relatives. Who Says? University of Warwick and Cardiff University, both in the UK, by lead researchers professors Chris Boyle and Simon Moore, March 22,2010. Who Cares Homo sapiens measure their life satisfaction based on their financial earnings. If you earn one-million dollars annually, but your peers earn two-million, you are unsatisfied. We carry a mental scoreboard that socially ranks our peers. It is based on education, residence, and age. This research is published in the journal of Psychological Science. It is the rank of income, not income itself. The secret: we have to know our income is More than others around us to get satisfaction from the money. One more time, we relate to money Emotionally, mostly at a nonconscious level. George F. Kaufman said, “Deep down - we are really shallow!” Who cares? Management must care about your feelings to properly reward their top producers. We need to have a higher income than other folks – people who matter to us. That is what counts. Knowing this massages our mental comfort zone. Know Thyself – right? See ya, --Would you own a powerful competitive advantage by reading and remembering three (3) books, articles and reports, when your peers can hardly finish one? Would it improve your chances for promotion and life satisfaction?
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We have 50 copies of our special Speed Reading report. It is free, no strings attached if you quickly contact us. It can change and improve your life. copyright © 2010 H. Bernard Wechsler www.speedlearning.org [email protected] --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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how to influence, persuade and convince folks. Fact: it’s not the Valedictorians who run the world, it is the socially intelligent (middle-level) graduates who become CEOs and win the big bucks. His follow up books, Social Intelligence and Ecological Intelligence expand his ideas that using our Left-Hemisphere (Consciousness) alone are not enough to make it in the Knowledge Economy. If you read Social Intelligence, you cannot ignore his findings about getting promotions, personal relationships, and happiness. It opens your eyes and changes your mind about yourself, and everybody else too. Relationships And Survival Wanna predict your odds of living or dying? Longevity is based on genes at least 50%, but Social Relationships “improve your odds of survival by 50%”. Who says? Brigham Young University, lead authors professors Lunstad and Smith. Google: the journal PLoS Medicine, July 28, 2010. Get this: friends, colleagues and relatives raise your statistical chance to hang out alive and well about 50%. The researchers show that lack of a safety net of people who care about you, is a risk factor for death. They use the word “social” endlessly so I looked in up in the dictionary. It’s Latin for partner, companion and comrade. Wait. Social is our life, welfare and relations with folks in the community. Does Instant Messaging count? Some scientists believe Not having a social life is worse than smoking, obesity, drugs and alcohol, and being a couch potato. “Bad” means it’ll kill you early. My friend’s Mother divorced and married seven-times, his sister, nine-times. Is it because they like to socialize? This report followed the subjects for seven and a half years and covered 148 previous studies. Maybe it is a kind word, a pat on the back, even tickling. These gestures add meaning to our lives. Do you believe this? When we take responsibility for folks (let them in our lives) we find a sense of purpose which translates to taking better care of ourselves. Last gem from the professors: this survival effect applies across all ages, not just old folks. Relationships are a safety net providing an additional level of protection. Goleman in his Social Intelligence, cites 18 separate studies to indicate powerful links between Social Connectivity and Mortality. That’s ‘mors’ from Latin, meaning Death. Don’t scratch your head and complain about all your jerky friends and relatives and wish you could sell at a discount, they help improve your odds of survival by 50%.
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Money And Happiness Social rank is where you are economically in your community, at work, and among your relatives. Don’t say you don’t know because we all keep track of social standing, it is the human scorecard for happiness. So what Dinero (casho) makes us happy only if it makes us richer than our neighbors or peers. The raise at work or winning the Lotto counts emotionally only if it differentiates us from our work colleagues, neighbors or relatives. Who Says? University of Warwick and Cardiff University, both in the UK, by lead researchers professors Chris Boyle and Simon Moore, March 22,2010. Who Cares Homo sapiens measure their life satisfaction based on their financial earnings. If you earn one-million dollars annually, but your peers earn two-million, you are unsatisfied. We carry a mental scoreboard that socially ranks our peers. It is based on education, residence, and age. This research is published in the journal of Psychological Science. It is the rank of income, not income itself. The secret: we have to know our income is More than others around us to get satisfaction from the money. One more time, we relate to money Emotionally, mostly at a nonconscious level. George F. Kaufman said, “Deep down - we are really shallow!” Who cares? Management must care about your feelings to properly reward their top producers. We need to have a higher income than other folks – people who matter to us. That is what counts. Knowing this massages our mental comfort zone. Know Thyself – right? See ya, --Would you own a powerful competitive advantage by reading and remembering three (3) books, articles and reports, when your peers can hardly finish one? Would it improve your chances for promotion and life satisfaction?
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We have 50 copies of our special Speed Reading report. It is free, no strings attached if you quickly contact us. It can change and improve your life. copyright © 2010 H. Bernard Wechsler www.speedlearning.org [email protected] --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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