Counseling Report
Content
Colegio de San Juan de Letran
Project in Counseling
Submitted by: Irish Pauline L. Ereño
Submitted to: Asst. Prof Ernesita Corpuz
March 23, 2011
I.
Client Background
Catherine Escolano, the one being counselled in this report, is a 26 years old Filipino widow from Taguig. She’s currently living with her parents and works at a sari-sari store. She has two daughters named Alex and Justine, aged 5 and 7, whom she loves so much. The presenting problem is one in which Mrs. Escolano’s husband for three years passed away almost two years ago. This occurred rather suddenly after her husband had an accident at work (falling debris hit his head). Upon hearing the news she went to be with her husband immediately and stayed with her for a week. Her husband began receiving physical therapy and appeared to be improving. Approximately two months later, her husband had another accident (slipped from the stairs) from which he never recovered. The loss was very sudden and she reports difficulty dealing with her feelings of loss. Recently, Mrs. Escolano went to clean out some things in their house and to make some changes in her bedroom. During the course of arranging/fixing the house, she was overwhelmed with her feelings of loss. She now reports feeling as if she should have moved beyond experiencing such strong feelings given that so much time has passed. She and her husband were very close, and she describes their relationship evolving over the years into more characteristic of friendship than that of husband and wife. She reports that some days are worse than others. On days when she is particularly stressed, she feels the loss more strongly because she cannot just pick up the phone and call her husband, who had always been there for her in the past. II. Counseling Assessment
Mrs. Escolano appears groomed and well dressed. Her speech pattern and affect appear normal. Eye contact was good until she became emotional and began crying. At that point eye contact became minimal. The following statements illustrate one point in the session when an attempt to convey empathy was particularly effective. Client: Uh, ewan. Gusto ko lang maging Masaya uli. Nadedepressed na yata ako masyado dahil dun e, di ko alam. Counselor: Depressed? Bakit ho? Lagi po ba kayong nakakaramdam ng ganito? Client: Ah, hindi naman...minsan, may sumpong lang. Ewan ko ba, baliw na yata ako. Mukha akong tanga. Umuwi kasi ako last week, namasyal kasi kami ng mga anak ko nun. Habang namamasyal kami, wala akong ibang iniisip kundi siya. *sandaling tigil* Tapos pagkauwingpagkauwi ko sa bahay, kinuha ko na lang lahat ng mga damit niya. Kinuha ko sa cabinet tapos inamoy-amoy ko *tumatawa* Wala akong ginawa nung araw na yon kundi amuyin lang yung damit niya. Naaamoy ko pa rin kasi yung pabango niya ron e. Nakakamiss.*malungkot ang mukha, nagiisip* Ang sakit-sakit. Lagi ko tuloy siyang naaalala. Counselor: Pasensya na po, condolence po. Mukhang napakahirap po siguro talaga nun para sa inyo. Ang mawalan ng pinakamamahal sa buhay. Client: Syempre naman, sinabi mo pa.
Counselor: Kailangan niyo po talagang lakasan ang loob niyo sa mga ganitong bagay...lalo na po sa mga anak niyo. Hanga po ako sa lakas ninyo, misis. Client: Hay, kung alam mo lang...napakahirap talagang maging isang single parent. Pakiramdam mo...pakiramdam mo, magisa ka lang talaga. *nanginginig na ang luha, pinipigil lang* Mrs. Escolano was referring to the feelings that came rushing back after two years. My intent was to reflect those feelings. Additionally, there was a sense earlier in the session that she was critical of herself for not having moved beyond such feelings. Providing an affirmation that pointed out her strength in going home and facing such feelings seemed indicated. The reason this example was chosen to illustrate particularly well reflected empathy is due to the fact that it was at this point that she began to cry. When her feelings of missing her husband were subsequently reflected, her crying increased even more. At this point in the session, I believe a fairly good holding environment had begun to develop. I had managed to convey warmth, positive regard and respect for both Mrs. Escolano and her feelings. I could sense how much she was hurting and my responses were genuine and sincere. Furthermore, in order to make sure I was understanding her and to communicate she was being heard, I had done a fairly good job of reflecting back to her the things that she was saying. Concerning issues of diversity, I think there’s no problem with that. We’re both Filipinos and we speak Tagalog well. I felt comfortable in communicating with her and I think I did fairly well in establishing a holding environment in which I was trying to understand her. While overall I did pretty well in attempting to feel and reflect her loss, there were times when her feelings were so intense that it was somewhat uncomfortable. Furthermore, I strongly suspect that I did not feel her pain at anywhere near the intensity that she felt it. Almost as if at a certain point, I shut it off and would not feel it anymore strongly. At one point, which is described below, I even attempted to fix it by shifting the focus from her pain to good memories. III. Plan of Action
Given the limitations imposed as a result of being unable to ask open-ended questions, I was not able to gather as much information that could possibly be useful in describing her concerns from a theoretical perspective. However, using the information that I have, one possible way of perceiving her emotions surrounding the death of her husband is from a person-centered perspective. Some of the characteristics of person-centered theory is that people have a self-actualizing tendency that innately moves them toward health, and that given a safe environment in which certain conditions are provided, this self actualizing tendency can flourish. As stated above, Mrs. Escolano lost her husband two years earlier. When recently seeing his things again, she was overwhelmed with feelings of loss, almost as fresh as they were two years ago. Furthermore, she expressed dissatisfaction in still experiencing such intense feelings after so much time has passed. This dissatisfaction could be viewed as her tendency to move in a positive direction and toward health. In other words, it is her self-actualizing tendency seeking to express itself. Again keeping the lack of information in perspective, a possible hypothesis about why she has not moved further along through the stages of loss might be that there does not exist in her social network the necessary conditions that would allow her to explore, experience and process her grief. For instance, she may have family members that handle pain differently and tend to discourage overt
expression of such emotions. If this is true, then providing the conditions of unconditional positive regard, warmth and empathy might allow her to move forward and beyond much of the pain that she reports experiencing. The following example illustrates a point in the session where the focus was shifted as a result of my response. Counselor: Wow, matagal-tagal na rin po yung naging relasyon niyo ano? Client: Oo, pero ang ikli naman ng naging marriage life namin. Kinuha kasi siya kaagad ni Lord e. Five years lang kami. 7 na siguro kung buhay pa siya ngayon. Nakakapanghinayang. Counselor: Pero sa 5 years na yon, naging masaya naman po kayo? May mga magagandang alaala po ba kayo tungkol sa kanya? Pwede po bang ishare niyo sakin yun? Client: Aba syempre, masaya akong kasama siya. Asawa ko siya e. Ang dami kong memories tungkol sa kanya. Alam mo nashock din talaga ako nung tinawagan nila ako sa bahay non, naospital daw kasi siya, naaksidente, nabagsakan daw ng mga bakal, lalo na sa braso tsaka ulo...sa construction kasi siya nagtatrabaho e... So anyway punta ko dun kaagad, akala ko talaga mamamatay na siya. Nagstay ako sa tabi niya for weeks, alalang-alala. Pero sa awa ng Diyos, nakarecover naman siya kaagad. Alam mo, simula non, lalo siyang naging sweet sakin. Hehe. *nakangiti* Counselor: Aba, mabuti naman po kung ganon. Client: Oo nga. Pero kahit na. Nadulas din siya sa hagdan after two months. Parang wala rin, hindi na siya nakarecover, namatay din siya. *nakayuko* In this example, she is describing her experience of losing her husband. In response, I attempted to focus her on the good memories that she had, rather than the loss. However, it was clear that she wanted and needed to focus on the loss and her current feelings of emptiness, demonstrating this by coming back to it. Two aspects of importance in this shift of focus are the accuracy of the client’s statement, and the motive prompting it me to shift focus. As she had been talking about her husband, I began to get the impression of how close they had been, and how much she still missed him. It was an assumption on my part that there were good memories. The reality may be that there existed more bad memories than good. What may be more important is the possible unconscious motive behind the shift. This was the first time she had actually described her immediate experience surrounding her husband’s death. Her description of the shock in losing her husband was vivid. By my response, it was as if I was trying to reduce the intensity of the feelings that were being expressed. As it turned out, this attempt at shifting the focus possibly affected the session less than it otherwise could have. This was due to the fact the client shifted it right back to where she wanted it, and we went on from there. I think my greatest strength in this session was my ability to provide empathy through reflection. This allowed me to both check my understanding, as well as communicate to Mrs. Escolano that she was being heard. Of particular importance was my ability once or twice to provide advanced empathy, going beyond her stated words to the implied emotions beyond her words. Concerning my weaknesses, my inclination to shift the focus at one point in the session from intense emotions to that of good memories is obviously the most glaring weakness. To some degree, I have felt
a sense of inadequacy in counseling those with loss, as well as the need for more specific training in doing so. Maybe what is really needed is an attempt to increase my ability in sitting silently and feeling more comfortable in the presence of such emotions. IV. Recommendation
Handling a loss is very difficult, especially for the spouse that remains and especially when you have children to take care of. I suggest that the client NEEDS to cry. She NEEDS to FEEL everything that happened. Crying is acceptable. Sometimes mothers, specially with small children, get so preoccupied with their daily routine that they don't really mourn over their husband because life still goes on and they have to go on with it. The problem with this is that they never truly mourn their husbands and that makes it harder for them to emotionally overcome it. Yes, there are benefits to "life goes on". She has children that need her constant attention--she can't let herself go or become sad and just do nothing, because there are people depending on her. This will propel her forward, but she must feel the pain, she mustn’t let the routine of life, keep her from facing what’s truly building up inside of her. I would gently suggest a couple of things. First, to let the client cry, and occasionally let the kids see her cry. They need her to be strong, but it's okay for them to know that Mommy is very sad. It makes it okay for them to be sad, too. Second, the client MUST accept help from others. She doesn’t need to try to be Wonder Woman and do it all alone with no one's help. She must rely on relatives, friends, neighbors, church, and anyone else who offers a helping hand. The support will ease her burdens and soothe her grief. Third, I recommend writing. It is something that I recommend to people and that I use myself. At night, when everyone is sleeping and she’s just with her thoughts. Put on her favorite music, music that relaxes you and even music that makes you want to cry. And write a letter. You can address the letter to God, to her husband or even to herself. And write till there is nothing else left to write. I also recommend that she encourage her children to remember their father fondly. It is not about forgetting or pretending he was never there, because that is easier than facing the fact he is not coming back. One night, they can all sit together and share stories, their favorite "dad" story. Yes, they will cry, the client will cry, but it will be a healthy way to remember him. At the end she could prepare a speech for them or even read the letter that she wrote to your husband or to God, and tell them how he will still be a part of their lives. He might not be there physically, but he will be there spiritually. If they ever need to talk to their father, they can close their eyes and talk to him. He will always listen. We don't understand God's ways. I once heard "you can't control what happens to you, but you can control how you respond to what happens to you". This will never be easy, but encouraging her children in believing that they can love someone after that person is gone, and that it's okay to feel angry, sad, or lonely is very helpful. It's even okay to be mad at Daddy for leaving them, because you know Daddy would understand. These are all normal emotions and they are all okay to feel. If they can really believe that their Daddy loved them and would never stop loving them even if they felt mad at him, it will help them process the worst of their emotions, and then slowly move on to remembering the good things about the father. The same goes for the client, by the way.
TRANSCRIPT:
Counselor: Irish Pauline L. Ereño Client: Catherine D. Escolano -------------------------------------------------------------Counselor: Hello po, magandang hapon po. Kayo po ba si Mrs. Catherine Escolano, yung nirecommend ng lola ko para sa counselling namin? Client: Uh, oo, ako nga...halika rito, tuloy ka. Ano bang gagawin natin? Ika-counseling mo raw ako? Counselor: Opo, ma’am. Para po to sa project namin. Magka-counsel lang po ako sa inyo, ikukwento niyo po kung ano yung mga gumugulo sa isip niyo ngayon, tas susubukan po natin siyang solusyunan ngayon. Ako nga po pala si Irish, kamusta po kayo? Client: Ito mabuti lang nanan. Sige, upo lang...hmm, teka... gumugulo sa isip ko ngayon? Counselor:Opo, ma’am. Client: Hahaha, andami kasi eh...san ba ko magsisimula...ano nga ba? *nagiisip* uh, ewan. Wala akong maisip eh. Counselor: Ah ganun po ba. O sige po, magisip lang po muna kayo. Maghihintay na lang po ako...pero pwede po bang pakisagutan na lang po muna to. Mga impormasyon lang po tungkol sa sarili niyo. Client: A o sige akin na, ang dami pala nito *tumatawa* para namang biodata to ... sandali lang a Counselor: Sige po, take your time. Client: okay *sinasagutan yung papel* After 5-10 minutes... Client: Okay, tapos na *nakangiti* Counselor: Sige po, salamat po *binabasa yung sagot* ... So, base po dito sa mga sinulat niyo, nalulungkot po kayo dahil hindi niyo na po alam ang gagawin ngayong patay na po ang asawa niyo? Client: Oo, ganun na nga. Counselor: Base rin po dito, gusto niyo na rin pong makapagmove on kahit papano sa asawa niyo? Client: Oo, ganun na nga. Counselor: Makamove-on po sa paanong paraan? Client: Uh, ewan. Gusto ko lang maging Masaya uli. Nadedepressed na yata ako masyado dahil dun e, di ko alam. Counselor: Depressed? Bakit ho? Lagi po ba kayong nakakaramdam ng ganito? Client: Ah, hindi naman...minsan, may sumpong lang. Ewan ko ba, baliw na yata ako. Mukha akong tanga. Umuwi kasi ako last week, namasyal kasi kami ng mga anak ko nun. Habang namamasyal kami, wala akong ibang iniisip kundi siya. *sandaling tigil* Tapos pagkauwing-pagkauwi ko sa bahay, kinuha ko na lang lahat ng mga damit niya. Kinuha ko sa cabinet tapos inamoy-amoy ko *tumatawa* Wala akong ginawa nung araw na yon kundi amuyin lang yung damit niya. Naaamoy ko pa rin kasi yung pabango niya ron e. Nakakamiss.*malungkot ang mukha, nagiisip* Ang sakit-sakit. Lagi ko tuloy siyang naaalala. Counselor: Pasensya na po, condolence po. Mukhang napakahirap po siguro talaga nun para sa inyo. Ang mawalan ng pinakamamahal sa buhay.
Client: Syempre naman, sinabi mo pa. Counselor: Kailangan niyo po talagang lakasan ang loob niyo sa mga ganitong bagay...lalo na po sa mga anak niyo. Hanga po ako sa lakas ninyo, misis. Client: Hay, kung alam mo lang...napakahirap talagang maging isang single parent. Pakiramdam mo...Pakiramdam mo, magisa ka lang talaga. *nanginginig na ang luha, pinipigil lang* Counselor: Pero kasama niyo naman po ang mga anak niyo, di po ba? Kamusta naman po sila? Ayos lang po ba sila? Client: Oo, ayos naman sila. Inaalagaan ko naman sila ng mabuti e. Nandyan din yung lola’t lola nila para mag-alaga sa kanila. Mahal na mahal namin sila...kaya lang minsan, nagaalala ako para sa kanila. Lalaki kasi sila na walang ama...alam mo na. Hindi ko alam kung pano sasabihin sa kanila kapag nagtanong sila kung nasan tatay nila... bakit yung ibang bata may mga tatay, sila wala...yung mga ganung bagay ba. At saka, iba rin yung parehong nandyan yung magulang mo para sayo diba? Kainis. Counselor: Opo, tama nga po yun. Client: Haaay... sana wag silang lumaking malungkot dahil wala silang ama. Feeling ko tuloy kasalanan ko kung mangyayari man yon. Counselor: Mukhang mahal na mahal niyo po talaga ang mga anak niyo, misis...at mukhang nag-aalala rin po kayo sa pwedeng mangyari sa kanila sa oras na lumaki na sila. Lalo na ngayong wala na silang tatay. Hindi niyo alam kung paano ipaliliwanag sa kanila yung tungkol sa pagkamatay ng tatay nila, di po ba? Client: Oo, ganun na nga. Ayoko lang kasi na lumaki sila na parang yung sa mga napapanood ko sa TV. Nakakalungkot. Medyo naiiyak nga ako kapag naiisip ko yon e. *nakayuko* Namimiss ko na talaga ang asawa ko.
Counselor: Opo, sige lang po. Nakikinig po ako, ilabas niyo lang po lahat ng nararamdaman niyo. Client: Salamat...ewan, gusto ko na lang talagang makita uli yung asawa ko e. Pero alam ko hindi na pwedeng mangyari yon. Kung maibabalik ko lang sana yung panahon...para hindi na mangyari yung nangyari, para hindi na siya namatay non. Miss na miss ko na talaga siya... si Mark *umiiyak* ... naiinis ako sa sarili ko. Hindi dapat ako nagkakaganito. Kung buhay lang siya, siguro...siguro pagtatawanan ako non, iinisin ako pag nakikita akong umiiyak. Loko yun e *tumatawa* tapos lalambingin ako. *umiiyak* loko talaga yun...bakit kailangan niyang mamatay kaagad. Sana...sana namatay na lang din ako kasama niya. *umiiyak ulit* Counselor: *tahimik lang, tinatapik ang likod ng client for comfort* Client: *medyo mahinahon na, tahimik lang, hindi na umiiyak* Counselor: Uh, maiba naman po tayo, misis. May mga naaalala po ba kayong alaala noon sa asawa niyo? Mga magagandang alaala? Saan kayo unang nagkita, nagkakilala? Anong ginagawa niyo kapag nagde-date kayo? Mga ganon... Client: Mga magagandang alaala? Ang dami eh. Siya kasi first love ko. Siya yung childhood sweetheart ko simula pa nung highschool. Counselor: Wow, matagal-tagal na rin po yung naging relasyon niyo ano? Client: Oo, pero ang ikli naman ng naging marriage life namin. Kinuha kasi siya kaagad ni Lord e. Five years lang kami. 7 na siguro kung buhay pa siya ngayon. Nakakapanghinayang. Counselor: Pero sa 5 years na yon, naging masaya naman po kayo? May mga magagandang alaala po ba kayo tungkol sa kanya? Pwede po bang ishare niyo sakin yun?
Client: Aba syempre, masaya akong kasama siya. Asawa ko siya e. Ang dami kong memories tungkol sa kanya. Alam mo nashock din talaga ako nung tinawagan nila ako sa bahay non, naospital daw kasi siya, naaksidente, nabagsakan daw ng mga bakal, lalo na sa braso tsaka ulo...sa construction kasi siya nagtatrabaho e... So anyway punta ko dun kaagad, akala ko talaga mamamatay na siya. Nagstay ako sa tabi niya for weeks, alalangalala. Pero sa awa ng Diyos, nakarecover naman siya kaagad. Alam mo, simula non, lalo siyang naging sweet sakin. Hehe. *nakangiti* Counselor: Aba, mabuti naman po kung ganon. Client: Oo nga. Pero kahit na. Nadulas din siya sa hagdan after two months. Parang wala rin, hindi na siya nakarecover, namatay din siya. *nakayuko* Counselor: Sorry po. Client: *nakayuko pa rin, pero hindi umiiyak* Ayos lang. Alam mo, ngayon lang talaga ako umiyak ng ganito. Wala kasi akong ibang pinagsasabihan nito e. Ang weird. Counselor: Talaga po? Ano pong pakiramdam niyo ngayon, Ma’am? Client: Medyo malungkot pa rin...namimiss ko pa rin asawa ko. Pero at the same time...kahit papano, medyo nabawasan. *nakangiti na uli* Counselor: Mabuti naman po kung ganon. Pero tandaan niyo po, joint effort po ito. Dapat tulungan niyo rin po ang sarili niyo na makarecover, misis. Client: *tumatango* Sige, susubukan ko. Counselor: *tahimik, naghihintay para tumaas uli ang ulo ng client* Client: *nakatingin na sakin* Counselor: Okay na po ba kayo, ma’am? Client: Medyo
Counselor: Mabuti naman po, misis... So, to summarize lang po, namatay po ang asawa niyo 2 years ago, at simula noon, lagi niyo na lang siyang naaalala. Namimiss niyo po siya’t wala po kayong ibang gusto kundi makasama siya. May dalawa po kayong anak at kayo po ang nagaaalaga sa kanila ngayon. Sinusubukan niyo po ang lahat ng makakaya niyo para sa kanila...tama po ba, misis? Client: Sakto Counselor: Okay sige po, misis...Misis, tungkol po dun sa mga sinabi niyo kanina, tungkol sa sana namatay na rin po kayo kasama nung asawa niyo...kayo na rin po ang nagsabi kanina... paano na lang din po yung mga anak niyo? Paano na lang din po kapag nawala kayo? Sino na lang po ang magaalaga sa kanila? Siguro po, hindi po natin laging alam yung plano ng Diyos para sa atin. Minsan, binibigyan niya tayo ng mga pagsubok na parang pagkakitang-pagkakita mo pa lang gusto mo ng sumuko... Pero, misis, di po ba? Tulad ng sabi ng iba, hindi ka bibigyan ng Diyos ng kung anumang pagsubok na hindi mo kayang pasanin. Nagtitiwala Siya sayo, na tiyak na malalampasan niyo rin yon. Hindi niya kayo pababayaan. Client: Mhm, tama ka dun. Siguro nga, tama ka. Minsan kasi, nakakaoverwhelm lang. Naiinis lang ako sa sarili ko na hanggang ngayon, umiiyak pa rin ako sa kanya. Nakakabadtrip. Naiinis ako sa sarili ko...ewan. Counselor: Pero normal lang naman po talaga sa isang tao yung malungkot kapag namatayan ng asawa e. Normal lang po na umiyak kayo, na ma-miss niyo siya. Ayos lang po na umiyak kayo dahil don, kaya wag po kayong magalit sa sarili niyo kapag nangyari yun. Wala po kayong kasalanan. Lakasan niyo lang po ang loob niyo. Client: Kung pwede ko lang talagang ibalik ang oras... Counselor: Opo, hindi niyo nga po siguro talaga maibabalik yung mga nangyari noon,
hindi niyo po kayang kontrolin o baguhin yung mga nangyari noon, pero kaya niyo pa rin naman pong magbago, kontrolin kung pano kayo magrerespond sa mga pangyayaring yon. Ayos lang pong umiyak, pero hindi dapat sa lahat ng oras umiiyak kayo. Wala rin po kasing mangyayari kung iiyak kayo palagi. Dapat po balanse. Kailangan niyo rin pong maging malakas, maging masaya. Nasasainyo rin naman po kung gusto niyong maging masaya e...at alam ko pong kaya niyo yan, kung susubukan lang ninyo, kahit paunti-unti, tiyak makakaya niyo. Nagegets niyo po ba, misis? Client: Oo, nagegets ko...pero anong gagawin ko? Counselor: May mga kakilala po ba kayo na pwedeng tumulong sa inyo? Mga kaibigan? Kamaganak? Kapitbahay? Na pwede niyo pong pagsabihan ng mga problema niyo? Client: oo, meron naman. Kaya lang minsan, nakakahiya e. Counselor: Opo, nakakahiya nga po minsan...pero ang mahalaga, mailabas niyo po lahat ng mga nararamdaman niyo. Para kahit papano, mabawasan yung sakit na nararamdaman niyo. Client: okay Counselor: Bakit hindi niyo rin po subukang magsulat? Client: Magsulat? Counselor: Opo, kapag magisa na lang po kayo sa kwarto, subukan niyo pong magsulat kay God, sa asawa niyo, o kaya mismo sa sarili niyo. Isulat niyo lahat ng gusto niyong sabihin. Mailabas niyo lang lahat ng nasasaloob niyo... Client: Waah, mukhang maganda yan a *nakangiti* Counselor: Bakit di niyo po subukan mamaya? Client: Susubukan ko talaga...pero yung mga anak ko? Pano yun?
Counselor: Bakit hindi niyo po sila kwentuhan tungkol sa papa nila? Yung mga magagandang alaala niyo tungkol sa kanya, ikuwento niyo po sa mga anak niyo, ganun. Para kahit wala siya sa piling nila, nandyan naman siya sa isip aat puso nila...na parte pa rin siya ng buhay nila. Client: Hahaha me ganun? Pero sige, maganda yan. Ano kaya kung basahin ko sa kanila yung mga sulat ko? Counselor: Opo, mas mabuti po kung ganun. Iparamdaman niyo lang po sa kanila na mahal na mahal po sila ng tatay nila, na hindi niya gusto na iwan sila. Client: Hindi naman talaga niya gusto yun e. Counselor: So, pano po, ma’am? Okay nap o ba kayo? Ano pong nararamdaman niyo? Client: Ok na ko...tulad ng sabi mo, kaya ko to, diba? Hahaha...maraming salamat a. Medyo ayos na yung pakiramdam ko...pero pwede bang wag mong sasabihin to sa ibang tao...nakakahiya e *tawa* Counselor: Syempre naman po, ma’am. Satinsatin lang po to. Wala pong makakaalam. Client: hahaha, mabuti naman. Baka kasi kung ano isipin nila sakin e...pero anyway, salamat...okay na ko Counselor: Wala pong anuman yun...kung gusto niyo po, pwede po kayong bumalik sakin. Usap po tayo uli tungkol dito. Makikinig po ako. Client: Talaga? Sige ba, sa susunod *nakanigiti* Counselor: Sige po, aalis na po ako. Salamat po uli sa time. Client: Wala yun. Basta babalik ka a. Counselor: opo, sige po. *end of transcript*
Basic Client Information 2.0 Personal identifying information Last Name: Maiden Name (if Applicable): Alias (if Applicable): Date of Birth: Citizenship: 2.1 Address Civic Address: Age: First Name: Initial:
Mailing Address:
2.2 Telephone Home: Leave Message: Yes Pager: No: Cellular: Voice Mail: Business:
2.3 Living Arrangement (have the client rate) Poor: Fair: Good: Excellent:
Comments: 2.4 Education High school: Technical/ College/ University: Grade point Average: Future educational plans: Have you ever been diagnosed with any type of learning disability? Yes No _______________________________________
If yes: (a) when? (b) by whom? (c) Any medication?
What are your present learning strategies?
2.5 Present employment / last employer: 2,6 Basic multicultural information Gender: Male Religion: Race: Cultural Identity: Is there anything you could teach me right now about your culture that may help facilitate this interview? Female: Preferred language: Sexuality:
2.7 Spiritual Information Religion: Are you a spiritual person? Yes Briefly explain your position: No
2.8 Legal status Do you have a criminal record? Yes If yes: what is your current legal status? What is our criminal record for the last ten years? Have you ever been incarcerated? Yes No: No:
If yes: when, where, and for how long? 3.0 Reason for assessment What is your major reason for seeking counseling? (self or external, e.g., court)?
3.1 How long have you felt like this? 3.2 To date, what have you tried to do in an attempt to feel better? 3.3 Have you tried counseling for this concern? 3.4 have you ever tried counseling before? Yes No
If yes: When, with whom, and what did you do in counseling? 3.5 What happened that led you to counseling? When was the last time you felt pain similar to this? 3.6 Do you ever think/see/feel (use the term that best matches the client’s modality) a time when you will feel better? What is your perception? 3. 7 Are you motivated to work to improve your current circumstances? Yes If no: what are you wanting to obtain through counselling? 3.8 Pretend that counseling went perfectly for you; what do you want in your life to be like after finish counseling? (Please do not base your answer on your current circumstances)? No
3.9 If you were to draw a metaphorical picture that best describe you current situation, what would you draw? (Give the client an example of metaphor. After the picture is drawn, ask the client to describe what all the different parts represent and what role the counsellor takes in this metaphor.)
How You Picture Your Life Today (Draw your current situation metaphor on this page)
Project in Counseling
Submitted by: Irish Pauline L. Ereño
Submitted to: Asst. Prof Ernesita Corpuz
March 23, 2011
I.
Client Background
Catherine Escolano, the one being counselled in this report, is a 26 years old Filipino widow from Taguig. She’s currently living with her parents and works at a sari-sari store. She has two daughters named Alex and Justine, aged 5 and 7, whom she loves so much. The presenting problem is one in which Mrs. Escolano’s husband for three years passed away almost two years ago. This occurred rather suddenly after her husband had an accident at work (falling debris hit his head). Upon hearing the news she went to be with her husband immediately and stayed with her for a week. Her husband began receiving physical therapy and appeared to be improving. Approximately two months later, her husband had another accident (slipped from the stairs) from which he never recovered. The loss was very sudden and she reports difficulty dealing with her feelings of loss. Recently, Mrs. Escolano went to clean out some things in their house and to make some changes in her bedroom. During the course of arranging/fixing the house, she was overwhelmed with her feelings of loss. She now reports feeling as if she should have moved beyond experiencing such strong feelings given that so much time has passed. She and her husband were very close, and she describes their relationship evolving over the years into more characteristic of friendship than that of husband and wife. She reports that some days are worse than others. On days when she is particularly stressed, she feels the loss more strongly because she cannot just pick up the phone and call her husband, who had always been there for her in the past. II. Counseling Assessment
Mrs. Escolano appears groomed and well dressed. Her speech pattern and affect appear normal. Eye contact was good until she became emotional and began crying. At that point eye contact became minimal. The following statements illustrate one point in the session when an attempt to convey empathy was particularly effective. Client: Uh, ewan. Gusto ko lang maging Masaya uli. Nadedepressed na yata ako masyado dahil dun e, di ko alam. Counselor: Depressed? Bakit ho? Lagi po ba kayong nakakaramdam ng ganito? Client: Ah, hindi naman...minsan, may sumpong lang. Ewan ko ba, baliw na yata ako. Mukha akong tanga. Umuwi kasi ako last week, namasyal kasi kami ng mga anak ko nun. Habang namamasyal kami, wala akong ibang iniisip kundi siya. *sandaling tigil* Tapos pagkauwingpagkauwi ko sa bahay, kinuha ko na lang lahat ng mga damit niya. Kinuha ko sa cabinet tapos inamoy-amoy ko *tumatawa* Wala akong ginawa nung araw na yon kundi amuyin lang yung damit niya. Naaamoy ko pa rin kasi yung pabango niya ron e. Nakakamiss.*malungkot ang mukha, nagiisip* Ang sakit-sakit. Lagi ko tuloy siyang naaalala. Counselor: Pasensya na po, condolence po. Mukhang napakahirap po siguro talaga nun para sa inyo. Ang mawalan ng pinakamamahal sa buhay. Client: Syempre naman, sinabi mo pa.
Counselor: Kailangan niyo po talagang lakasan ang loob niyo sa mga ganitong bagay...lalo na po sa mga anak niyo. Hanga po ako sa lakas ninyo, misis. Client: Hay, kung alam mo lang...napakahirap talagang maging isang single parent. Pakiramdam mo...pakiramdam mo, magisa ka lang talaga. *nanginginig na ang luha, pinipigil lang* Mrs. Escolano was referring to the feelings that came rushing back after two years. My intent was to reflect those feelings. Additionally, there was a sense earlier in the session that she was critical of herself for not having moved beyond such feelings. Providing an affirmation that pointed out her strength in going home and facing such feelings seemed indicated. The reason this example was chosen to illustrate particularly well reflected empathy is due to the fact that it was at this point that she began to cry. When her feelings of missing her husband were subsequently reflected, her crying increased even more. At this point in the session, I believe a fairly good holding environment had begun to develop. I had managed to convey warmth, positive regard and respect for both Mrs. Escolano and her feelings. I could sense how much she was hurting and my responses were genuine and sincere. Furthermore, in order to make sure I was understanding her and to communicate she was being heard, I had done a fairly good job of reflecting back to her the things that she was saying. Concerning issues of diversity, I think there’s no problem with that. We’re both Filipinos and we speak Tagalog well. I felt comfortable in communicating with her and I think I did fairly well in establishing a holding environment in which I was trying to understand her. While overall I did pretty well in attempting to feel and reflect her loss, there were times when her feelings were so intense that it was somewhat uncomfortable. Furthermore, I strongly suspect that I did not feel her pain at anywhere near the intensity that she felt it. Almost as if at a certain point, I shut it off and would not feel it anymore strongly. At one point, which is described below, I even attempted to fix it by shifting the focus from her pain to good memories. III. Plan of Action
Given the limitations imposed as a result of being unable to ask open-ended questions, I was not able to gather as much information that could possibly be useful in describing her concerns from a theoretical perspective. However, using the information that I have, one possible way of perceiving her emotions surrounding the death of her husband is from a person-centered perspective. Some of the characteristics of person-centered theory is that people have a self-actualizing tendency that innately moves them toward health, and that given a safe environment in which certain conditions are provided, this self actualizing tendency can flourish. As stated above, Mrs. Escolano lost her husband two years earlier. When recently seeing his things again, she was overwhelmed with feelings of loss, almost as fresh as they were two years ago. Furthermore, she expressed dissatisfaction in still experiencing such intense feelings after so much time has passed. This dissatisfaction could be viewed as her tendency to move in a positive direction and toward health. In other words, it is her self-actualizing tendency seeking to express itself. Again keeping the lack of information in perspective, a possible hypothesis about why she has not moved further along through the stages of loss might be that there does not exist in her social network the necessary conditions that would allow her to explore, experience and process her grief. For instance, she may have family members that handle pain differently and tend to discourage overt
expression of such emotions. If this is true, then providing the conditions of unconditional positive regard, warmth and empathy might allow her to move forward and beyond much of the pain that she reports experiencing. The following example illustrates a point in the session where the focus was shifted as a result of my response. Counselor: Wow, matagal-tagal na rin po yung naging relasyon niyo ano? Client: Oo, pero ang ikli naman ng naging marriage life namin. Kinuha kasi siya kaagad ni Lord e. Five years lang kami. 7 na siguro kung buhay pa siya ngayon. Nakakapanghinayang. Counselor: Pero sa 5 years na yon, naging masaya naman po kayo? May mga magagandang alaala po ba kayo tungkol sa kanya? Pwede po bang ishare niyo sakin yun? Client: Aba syempre, masaya akong kasama siya. Asawa ko siya e. Ang dami kong memories tungkol sa kanya. Alam mo nashock din talaga ako nung tinawagan nila ako sa bahay non, naospital daw kasi siya, naaksidente, nabagsakan daw ng mga bakal, lalo na sa braso tsaka ulo...sa construction kasi siya nagtatrabaho e... So anyway punta ko dun kaagad, akala ko talaga mamamatay na siya. Nagstay ako sa tabi niya for weeks, alalang-alala. Pero sa awa ng Diyos, nakarecover naman siya kaagad. Alam mo, simula non, lalo siyang naging sweet sakin. Hehe. *nakangiti* Counselor: Aba, mabuti naman po kung ganon. Client: Oo nga. Pero kahit na. Nadulas din siya sa hagdan after two months. Parang wala rin, hindi na siya nakarecover, namatay din siya. *nakayuko* In this example, she is describing her experience of losing her husband. In response, I attempted to focus her on the good memories that she had, rather than the loss. However, it was clear that she wanted and needed to focus on the loss and her current feelings of emptiness, demonstrating this by coming back to it. Two aspects of importance in this shift of focus are the accuracy of the client’s statement, and the motive prompting it me to shift focus. As she had been talking about her husband, I began to get the impression of how close they had been, and how much she still missed him. It was an assumption on my part that there were good memories. The reality may be that there existed more bad memories than good. What may be more important is the possible unconscious motive behind the shift. This was the first time she had actually described her immediate experience surrounding her husband’s death. Her description of the shock in losing her husband was vivid. By my response, it was as if I was trying to reduce the intensity of the feelings that were being expressed. As it turned out, this attempt at shifting the focus possibly affected the session less than it otherwise could have. This was due to the fact the client shifted it right back to where she wanted it, and we went on from there. I think my greatest strength in this session was my ability to provide empathy through reflection. This allowed me to both check my understanding, as well as communicate to Mrs. Escolano that she was being heard. Of particular importance was my ability once or twice to provide advanced empathy, going beyond her stated words to the implied emotions beyond her words. Concerning my weaknesses, my inclination to shift the focus at one point in the session from intense emotions to that of good memories is obviously the most glaring weakness. To some degree, I have felt
a sense of inadequacy in counseling those with loss, as well as the need for more specific training in doing so. Maybe what is really needed is an attempt to increase my ability in sitting silently and feeling more comfortable in the presence of such emotions. IV. Recommendation
Handling a loss is very difficult, especially for the spouse that remains and especially when you have children to take care of. I suggest that the client NEEDS to cry. She NEEDS to FEEL everything that happened. Crying is acceptable. Sometimes mothers, specially with small children, get so preoccupied with their daily routine that they don't really mourn over their husband because life still goes on and they have to go on with it. The problem with this is that they never truly mourn their husbands and that makes it harder for them to emotionally overcome it. Yes, there are benefits to "life goes on". She has children that need her constant attention--she can't let herself go or become sad and just do nothing, because there are people depending on her. This will propel her forward, but she must feel the pain, she mustn’t let the routine of life, keep her from facing what’s truly building up inside of her. I would gently suggest a couple of things. First, to let the client cry, and occasionally let the kids see her cry. They need her to be strong, but it's okay for them to know that Mommy is very sad. It makes it okay for them to be sad, too. Second, the client MUST accept help from others. She doesn’t need to try to be Wonder Woman and do it all alone with no one's help. She must rely on relatives, friends, neighbors, church, and anyone else who offers a helping hand. The support will ease her burdens and soothe her grief. Third, I recommend writing. It is something that I recommend to people and that I use myself. At night, when everyone is sleeping and she’s just with her thoughts. Put on her favorite music, music that relaxes you and even music that makes you want to cry. And write a letter. You can address the letter to God, to her husband or even to herself. And write till there is nothing else left to write. I also recommend that she encourage her children to remember their father fondly. It is not about forgetting or pretending he was never there, because that is easier than facing the fact he is not coming back. One night, they can all sit together and share stories, their favorite "dad" story. Yes, they will cry, the client will cry, but it will be a healthy way to remember him. At the end she could prepare a speech for them or even read the letter that she wrote to your husband or to God, and tell them how he will still be a part of their lives. He might not be there physically, but he will be there spiritually. If they ever need to talk to their father, they can close their eyes and talk to him. He will always listen. We don't understand God's ways. I once heard "you can't control what happens to you, but you can control how you respond to what happens to you". This will never be easy, but encouraging her children in believing that they can love someone after that person is gone, and that it's okay to feel angry, sad, or lonely is very helpful. It's even okay to be mad at Daddy for leaving them, because you know Daddy would understand. These are all normal emotions and they are all okay to feel. If they can really believe that their Daddy loved them and would never stop loving them even if they felt mad at him, it will help them process the worst of their emotions, and then slowly move on to remembering the good things about the father. The same goes for the client, by the way.
TRANSCRIPT:
Counselor: Irish Pauline L. Ereño Client: Catherine D. Escolano -------------------------------------------------------------Counselor: Hello po, magandang hapon po. Kayo po ba si Mrs. Catherine Escolano, yung nirecommend ng lola ko para sa counselling namin? Client: Uh, oo, ako nga...halika rito, tuloy ka. Ano bang gagawin natin? Ika-counseling mo raw ako? Counselor: Opo, ma’am. Para po to sa project namin. Magka-counsel lang po ako sa inyo, ikukwento niyo po kung ano yung mga gumugulo sa isip niyo ngayon, tas susubukan po natin siyang solusyunan ngayon. Ako nga po pala si Irish, kamusta po kayo? Client: Ito mabuti lang nanan. Sige, upo lang...hmm, teka... gumugulo sa isip ko ngayon? Counselor:Opo, ma’am. Client: Hahaha, andami kasi eh...san ba ko magsisimula...ano nga ba? *nagiisip* uh, ewan. Wala akong maisip eh. Counselor: Ah ganun po ba. O sige po, magisip lang po muna kayo. Maghihintay na lang po ako...pero pwede po bang pakisagutan na lang po muna to. Mga impormasyon lang po tungkol sa sarili niyo. Client: A o sige akin na, ang dami pala nito *tumatawa* para namang biodata to ... sandali lang a Counselor: Sige po, take your time. Client: okay *sinasagutan yung papel* After 5-10 minutes... Client: Okay, tapos na *nakangiti* Counselor: Sige po, salamat po *binabasa yung sagot* ... So, base po dito sa mga sinulat niyo, nalulungkot po kayo dahil hindi niyo na po alam ang gagawin ngayong patay na po ang asawa niyo? Client: Oo, ganun na nga. Counselor: Base rin po dito, gusto niyo na rin pong makapagmove on kahit papano sa asawa niyo? Client: Oo, ganun na nga. Counselor: Makamove-on po sa paanong paraan? Client: Uh, ewan. Gusto ko lang maging Masaya uli. Nadedepressed na yata ako masyado dahil dun e, di ko alam. Counselor: Depressed? Bakit ho? Lagi po ba kayong nakakaramdam ng ganito? Client: Ah, hindi naman...minsan, may sumpong lang. Ewan ko ba, baliw na yata ako. Mukha akong tanga. Umuwi kasi ako last week, namasyal kasi kami ng mga anak ko nun. Habang namamasyal kami, wala akong ibang iniisip kundi siya. *sandaling tigil* Tapos pagkauwing-pagkauwi ko sa bahay, kinuha ko na lang lahat ng mga damit niya. Kinuha ko sa cabinet tapos inamoy-amoy ko *tumatawa* Wala akong ginawa nung araw na yon kundi amuyin lang yung damit niya. Naaamoy ko pa rin kasi yung pabango niya ron e. Nakakamiss.*malungkot ang mukha, nagiisip* Ang sakit-sakit. Lagi ko tuloy siyang naaalala. Counselor: Pasensya na po, condolence po. Mukhang napakahirap po siguro talaga nun para sa inyo. Ang mawalan ng pinakamamahal sa buhay.
Client: Syempre naman, sinabi mo pa. Counselor: Kailangan niyo po talagang lakasan ang loob niyo sa mga ganitong bagay...lalo na po sa mga anak niyo. Hanga po ako sa lakas ninyo, misis. Client: Hay, kung alam mo lang...napakahirap talagang maging isang single parent. Pakiramdam mo...Pakiramdam mo, magisa ka lang talaga. *nanginginig na ang luha, pinipigil lang* Counselor: Pero kasama niyo naman po ang mga anak niyo, di po ba? Kamusta naman po sila? Ayos lang po ba sila? Client: Oo, ayos naman sila. Inaalagaan ko naman sila ng mabuti e. Nandyan din yung lola’t lola nila para mag-alaga sa kanila. Mahal na mahal namin sila...kaya lang minsan, nagaalala ako para sa kanila. Lalaki kasi sila na walang ama...alam mo na. Hindi ko alam kung pano sasabihin sa kanila kapag nagtanong sila kung nasan tatay nila... bakit yung ibang bata may mga tatay, sila wala...yung mga ganung bagay ba. At saka, iba rin yung parehong nandyan yung magulang mo para sayo diba? Kainis. Counselor: Opo, tama nga po yun. Client: Haaay... sana wag silang lumaking malungkot dahil wala silang ama. Feeling ko tuloy kasalanan ko kung mangyayari man yon. Counselor: Mukhang mahal na mahal niyo po talaga ang mga anak niyo, misis...at mukhang nag-aalala rin po kayo sa pwedeng mangyari sa kanila sa oras na lumaki na sila. Lalo na ngayong wala na silang tatay. Hindi niyo alam kung paano ipaliliwanag sa kanila yung tungkol sa pagkamatay ng tatay nila, di po ba? Client: Oo, ganun na nga. Ayoko lang kasi na lumaki sila na parang yung sa mga napapanood ko sa TV. Nakakalungkot. Medyo naiiyak nga ako kapag naiisip ko yon e. *nakayuko* Namimiss ko na talaga ang asawa ko.
Counselor: Opo, sige lang po. Nakikinig po ako, ilabas niyo lang po lahat ng nararamdaman niyo. Client: Salamat...ewan, gusto ko na lang talagang makita uli yung asawa ko e. Pero alam ko hindi na pwedeng mangyari yon. Kung maibabalik ko lang sana yung panahon...para hindi na mangyari yung nangyari, para hindi na siya namatay non. Miss na miss ko na talaga siya... si Mark *umiiyak* ... naiinis ako sa sarili ko. Hindi dapat ako nagkakaganito. Kung buhay lang siya, siguro...siguro pagtatawanan ako non, iinisin ako pag nakikita akong umiiyak. Loko yun e *tumatawa* tapos lalambingin ako. *umiiyak* loko talaga yun...bakit kailangan niyang mamatay kaagad. Sana...sana namatay na lang din ako kasama niya. *umiiyak ulit* Counselor: *tahimik lang, tinatapik ang likod ng client for comfort* Client: *medyo mahinahon na, tahimik lang, hindi na umiiyak* Counselor: Uh, maiba naman po tayo, misis. May mga naaalala po ba kayong alaala noon sa asawa niyo? Mga magagandang alaala? Saan kayo unang nagkita, nagkakilala? Anong ginagawa niyo kapag nagde-date kayo? Mga ganon... Client: Mga magagandang alaala? Ang dami eh. Siya kasi first love ko. Siya yung childhood sweetheart ko simula pa nung highschool. Counselor: Wow, matagal-tagal na rin po yung naging relasyon niyo ano? Client: Oo, pero ang ikli naman ng naging marriage life namin. Kinuha kasi siya kaagad ni Lord e. Five years lang kami. 7 na siguro kung buhay pa siya ngayon. Nakakapanghinayang. Counselor: Pero sa 5 years na yon, naging masaya naman po kayo? May mga magagandang alaala po ba kayo tungkol sa kanya? Pwede po bang ishare niyo sakin yun?
Client: Aba syempre, masaya akong kasama siya. Asawa ko siya e. Ang dami kong memories tungkol sa kanya. Alam mo nashock din talaga ako nung tinawagan nila ako sa bahay non, naospital daw kasi siya, naaksidente, nabagsakan daw ng mga bakal, lalo na sa braso tsaka ulo...sa construction kasi siya nagtatrabaho e... So anyway punta ko dun kaagad, akala ko talaga mamamatay na siya. Nagstay ako sa tabi niya for weeks, alalangalala. Pero sa awa ng Diyos, nakarecover naman siya kaagad. Alam mo, simula non, lalo siyang naging sweet sakin. Hehe. *nakangiti* Counselor: Aba, mabuti naman po kung ganon. Client: Oo nga. Pero kahit na. Nadulas din siya sa hagdan after two months. Parang wala rin, hindi na siya nakarecover, namatay din siya. *nakayuko* Counselor: Sorry po. Client: *nakayuko pa rin, pero hindi umiiyak* Ayos lang. Alam mo, ngayon lang talaga ako umiyak ng ganito. Wala kasi akong ibang pinagsasabihan nito e. Ang weird. Counselor: Talaga po? Ano pong pakiramdam niyo ngayon, Ma’am? Client: Medyo malungkot pa rin...namimiss ko pa rin asawa ko. Pero at the same time...kahit papano, medyo nabawasan. *nakangiti na uli* Counselor: Mabuti naman po kung ganon. Pero tandaan niyo po, joint effort po ito. Dapat tulungan niyo rin po ang sarili niyo na makarecover, misis. Client: *tumatango* Sige, susubukan ko. Counselor: *tahimik, naghihintay para tumaas uli ang ulo ng client* Client: *nakatingin na sakin* Counselor: Okay na po ba kayo, ma’am? Client: Medyo
Counselor: Mabuti naman po, misis... So, to summarize lang po, namatay po ang asawa niyo 2 years ago, at simula noon, lagi niyo na lang siyang naaalala. Namimiss niyo po siya’t wala po kayong ibang gusto kundi makasama siya. May dalawa po kayong anak at kayo po ang nagaaalaga sa kanila ngayon. Sinusubukan niyo po ang lahat ng makakaya niyo para sa kanila...tama po ba, misis? Client: Sakto Counselor: Okay sige po, misis...Misis, tungkol po dun sa mga sinabi niyo kanina, tungkol sa sana namatay na rin po kayo kasama nung asawa niyo...kayo na rin po ang nagsabi kanina... paano na lang din po yung mga anak niyo? Paano na lang din po kapag nawala kayo? Sino na lang po ang magaalaga sa kanila? Siguro po, hindi po natin laging alam yung plano ng Diyos para sa atin. Minsan, binibigyan niya tayo ng mga pagsubok na parang pagkakitang-pagkakita mo pa lang gusto mo ng sumuko... Pero, misis, di po ba? Tulad ng sabi ng iba, hindi ka bibigyan ng Diyos ng kung anumang pagsubok na hindi mo kayang pasanin. Nagtitiwala Siya sayo, na tiyak na malalampasan niyo rin yon. Hindi niya kayo pababayaan. Client: Mhm, tama ka dun. Siguro nga, tama ka. Minsan kasi, nakakaoverwhelm lang. Naiinis lang ako sa sarili ko na hanggang ngayon, umiiyak pa rin ako sa kanya. Nakakabadtrip. Naiinis ako sa sarili ko...ewan. Counselor: Pero normal lang naman po talaga sa isang tao yung malungkot kapag namatayan ng asawa e. Normal lang po na umiyak kayo, na ma-miss niyo siya. Ayos lang po na umiyak kayo dahil don, kaya wag po kayong magalit sa sarili niyo kapag nangyari yun. Wala po kayong kasalanan. Lakasan niyo lang po ang loob niyo. Client: Kung pwede ko lang talagang ibalik ang oras... Counselor: Opo, hindi niyo nga po siguro talaga maibabalik yung mga nangyari noon,
hindi niyo po kayang kontrolin o baguhin yung mga nangyari noon, pero kaya niyo pa rin naman pong magbago, kontrolin kung pano kayo magrerespond sa mga pangyayaring yon. Ayos lang pong umiyak, pero hindi dapat sa lahat ng oras umiiyak kayo. Wala rin po kasing mangyayari kung iiyak kayo palagi. Dapat po balanse. Kailangan niyo rin pong maging malakas, maging masaya. Nasasainyo rin naman po kung gusto niyong maging masaya e...at alam ko pong kaya niyo yan, kung susubukan lang ninyo, kahit paunti-unti, tiyak makakaya niyo. Nagegets niyo po ba, misis? Client: Oo, nagegets ko...pero anong gagawin ko? Counselor: May mga kakilala po ba kayo na pwedeng tumulong sa inyo? Mga kaibigan? Kamaganak? Kapitbahay? Na pwede niyo pong pagsabihan ng mga problema niyo? Client: oo, meron naman. Kaya lang minsan, nakakahiya e. Counselor: Opo, nakakahiya nga po minsan...pero ang mahalaga, mailabas niyo po lahat ng mga nararamdaman niyo. Para kahit papano, mabawasan yung sakit na nararamdaman niyo. Client: okay Counselor: Bakit hindi niyo rin po subukang magsulat? Client: Magsulat? Counselor: Opo, kapag magisa na lang po kayo sa kwarto, subukan niyo pong magsulat kay God, sa asawa niyo, o kaya mismo sa sarili niyo. Isulat niyo lahat ng gusto niyong sabihin. Mailabas niyo lang lahat ng nasasaloob niyo... Client: Waah, mukhang maganda yan a *nakangiti* Counselor: Bakit di niyo po subukan mamaya? Client: Susubukan ko talaga...pero yung mga anak ko? Pano yun?
Counselor: Bakit hindi niyo po sila kwentuhan tungkol sa papa nila? Yung mga magagandang alaala niyo tungkol sa kanya, ikuwento niyo po sa mga anak niyo, ganun. Para kahit wala siya sa piling nila, nandyan naman siya sa isip aat puso nila...na parte pa rin siya ng buhay nila. Client: Hahaha me ganun? Pero sige, maganda yan. Ano kaya kung basahin ko sa kanila yung mga sulat ko? Counselor: Opo, mas mabuti po kung ganun. Iparamdaman niyo lang po sa kanila na mahal na mahal po sila ng tatay nila, na hindi niya gusto na iwan sila. Client: Hindi naman talaga niya gusto yun e. Counselor: So, pano po, ma’am? Okay nap o ba kayo? Ano pong nararamdaman niyo? Client: Ok na ko...tulad ng sabi mo, kaya ko to, diba? Hahaha...maraming salamat a. Medyo ayos na yung pakiramdam ko...pero pwede bang wag mong sasabihin to sa ibang tao...nakakahiya e *tawa* Counselor: Syempre naman po, ma’am. Satinsatin lang po to. Wala pong makakaalam. Client: hahaha, mabuti naman. Baka kasi kung ano isipin nila sakin e...pero anyway, salamat...okay na ko Counselor: Wala pong anuman yun...kung gusto niyo po, pwede po kayong bumalik sakin. Usap po tayo uli tungkol dito. Makikinig po ako. Client: Talaga? Sige ba, sa susunod *nakanigiti* Counselor: Sige po, aalis na po ako. Salamat po uli sa time. Client: Wala yun. Basta babalik ka a. Counselor: opo, sige po. *end of transcript*
Basic Client Information 2.0 Personal identifying information Last Name: Maiden Name (if Applicable): Alias (if Applicable): Date of Birth: Citizenship: 2.1 Address Civic Address: Age: First Name: Initial:
Mailing Address:
2.2 Telephone Home: Leave Message: Yes Pager: No: Cellular: Voice Mail: Business:
2.3 Living Arrangement (have the client rate) Poor: Fair: Good: Excellent:
Comments: 2.4 Education High school: Technical/ College/ University: Grade point Average: Future educational plans: Have you ever been diagnosed with any type of learning disability? Yes No _______________________________________
If yes: (a) when? (b) by whom? (c) Any medication?
What are your present learning strategies?
2.5 Present employment / last employer: 2,6 Basic multicultural information Gender: Male Religion: Race: Cultural Identity: Is there anything you could teach me right now about your culture that may help facilitate this interview? Female: Preferred language: Sexuality:
2.7 Spiritual Information Religion: Are you a spiritual person? Yes Briefly explain your position: No
2.8 Legal status Do you have a criminal record? Yes If yes: what is your current legal status? What is our criminal record for the last ten years? Have you ever been incarcerated? Yes No: No:
If yes: when, where, and for how long? 3.0 Reason for assessment What is your major reason for seeking counseling? (self or external, e.g., court)?
3.1 How long have you felt like this? 3.2 To date, what have you tried to do in an attempt to feel better? 3.3 Have you tried counseling for this concern? 3.4 have you ever tried counseling before? Yes No
If yes: When, with whom, and what did you do in counseling? 3.5 What happened that led you to counseling? When was the last time you felt pain similar to this? 3.6 Do you ever think/see/feel (use the term that best matches the client’s modality) a time when you will feel better? What is your perception? 3. 7 Are you motivated to work to improve your current circumstances? Yes If no: what are you wanting to obtain through counselling? 3.8 Pretend that counseling went perfectly for you; what do you want in your life to be like after finish counseling? (Please do not base your answer on your current circumstances)? No
3.9 If you were to draw a metaphorical picture that best describe you current situation, what would you draw? (Give the client an example of metaphor. After the picture is drawn, ask the client to describe what all the different parts represent and what role the counsellor takes in this metaphor.)
How You Picture Your Life Today (Draw your current situation metaphor on this page)
