In Memory of Ellen Wallner

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In Memory of Ellen Wallner
By Cheryl written of this 24th day of January 2013 dedicated to my mother on her birthday. She will never be forgotten, I just want everyone to remember.

“But there's a story behind everything. How a picture got on a wall. How a scar got on your face. Sometimes the stories are simple, and sometimes they are hard and heartbreaking. But behind all your stories is always your mother's story, because hers is where yours begin.” A mom's hug lasts long after she lets go. A person never sees all that their mother has been to them until it's too late to let her know they see it. The death of a mother is the first sorrow wept without her. All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel mother. A mother is not a person to lean on but a person to make leaning unnecessary. Mothers love is the fuel that enables a normal human being to do the impossible to reach for their dreams and believe in themselves enough to reach them. A daughter without her mother is a woman broken. It is a loss that turns to arthritis and settles deep into her bones. I blame my mother for nothing, but forgive her for everything. Sometimes you can’t let go of the past without facing it again. The loss of our mother turns our life upside down. Our world as we knew it has changed and those changes require that we in turn adjust to a new "normal." Loss of your mother no matter the circumstance is the worst thing anyone can handle....

Everyone copes differently, some cry for the loss others smile because they know they'll see her again. Perhaps they are not the stars up in the sky, but rather openings in Heaven where the love of our mother pours through and shines down upon us to let us know she is happy. The only love that I really believe in is a mother’s love for her children. In a child's eyes, a mother is a goddess. She can be glorious or terrible, benevolent or filled with wrath, but she commands love either way. I am convinced that this is the greatest power in the universe. You don't realize how strong a person really is until you see them at their weakest moment. When you lose someone, the world still turns, the stars still shine and the wheels of time move inexorably on...but somewhere deep within your soul, a small part of you dies. Remember that everyone you meet is afraid of something, loves something, and has lost something. For my mom on her birthday:
I saw her today, Just like I seen her yesterday, Everytime I close my eyes to pray. She may not be there when my eyes open to the sunlight, I carry her memory though until the night, When I can see her again and hold her tight. At least in my dreams I know everything will be all right. Sometimes I wonder what is real, Is what you see and touch or what you feel? Memorys are things nobody can steal. I now understand more than I ever did, I used to stuff everything inside and cover it with a lid, Feeling like I could have done something more right into the dark is where my soul once hid. Today I have to finally say, I have figured out my way,

Helping others see though their loss to live another day. I miss her and love her as I did before, But now blaming myself I do no more, Inside my heart her memory I store, Until the day our spirits can soar as they once did before. Just the love you give to each other, Can help one though a time like nothing other, Don’t take for granted the love and hugs of your MOTHER. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------The following video below I made for my Mom. Her birthday is coming up, and this is an especially emotional time for me. You see my Mom died on June 29, 2002 from suicide. This story is now the story of so many people around the world. Back then little was said about the link between suicide and prescription medication. Today it is impossible to ignore, not only that, so much information has come to light. The studies and effects of these medications were literally hid from the public for many years. Finally for the first time we are hearing the truth. Below I will link you to the documents we all should see before deciding to take these cure all medications that have been linked to MASS MURDER, SUICIDE, VIOLENCE, mania and other alarming issues. I have to say that the information now at our finger tips shines new light on how the public has been left in the dark and how we have been betrayed in such a way it's really hard to accept. Wrapping our minds around the truth is not easy. I have the scars to prove that. The lies of 911 and the lies of the facts of prescription medication destroyed my life, and I want someone to pay for that. If the only thing I can do is use my small hands and my big mouth to make others aware so be it! September 11, 2001 started the domino effect of events that lead my mother to suicide and the destruction of what I once knew as a family. You see my dad worked to build a business from the ground up. He was so proud of it and so were we. I saw a light in his eyes that I had NEVER seen during the times this business was successful. This business employed my brother, my husband, my cousin, it was a family business. THE REAL AMERICAN DREAM. All that came crashing down with the trade center. After that day the phone stopped ringing, people stopped spending money, the total destruction of small business that once thrived in the United States became nothing more than a memory. Finding out the truth behind 911 has made me very angry. I am not alone, scientist, engineers, family, friends, we all are outraged at the lies that have surfaced and documents that have become declassified. I'm not going to go into all that, but the point is, this fallout ripped away life as we knew it, even if you didn't lose a loved one, the destruction that day caused is far and wide.

I saw mom cry a lot over this loss. Something died inside my dad and the rest of the family, however, that was nothing compared to what comes next. My mom prior to all of this started becoming dependent on medication. This came shortly after a surgery she had. The doctors kept giving her pills for everything. My mom was a nurse so this wasn't a hard accomplishment. It was aided by her profession in a big way. Even in the medical profession the fallout of depression and the treatment was not solid, the outcome was then unknown. WHY? Maybe it’s because billions of dollars were spent to hide the effects of these medications. Their link to murder and violence goes back many years. She also started taking medications for depression. As my dad’s business faltered and as her dependency grew she became depressed and started taking more narcotics and the anti- depressant was added to her diet of pills. Seven months later my brother found my mom dead in her bed. Living with my brothers last memory of my mother has been much harder to deal with over the years, than trying to understand why she did this. I know why now, but I really didn't have the whole picture then. I am writing a book about it so you can see details there I just wanted to give a little background, so others can know the truth. September 11 wounded my family, anti- depressants and prescription medication murdered my family. I made this video in memory of ELLEN WALLNER, my mom, who is dead now thanks to lies and disinformation. Someone on these powerful drugs can't see. I know because I spent several years getting off of them myself. I know from the inside and the outside what these things can do. I just thank GOD I lived to tell this story!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM! Click the link below to view the video. http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage &v=UlOQ4gBc4GE
Here are some links for information on the link to suicide and prescription medications http://www.scribd.com/doc/121333819/The-Link-to-Suicide-In-the-Military-and-SSRIs http://www.scribd.com/doc/118829685/Violence-and-Mania-Caused-by-SSRI Also visit my blogs Cher MyOpinion www.myopinionsowned.blogspot.com The Madness of Silence www.themadnessofsilence.blogspot.com

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