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Content
Why ‘ugly’ people marry angels.
Olufemi Fasanya +2348037257479, +234808390405 www.heavenonearthmarriage.blogspot.com
Introduction
Dear Reader, This is the write up of the message that the Lord inspired me to speak to singles on, in the programme tagged, why ‘ugly’ people get married to angels. My prayer is that as you read it, it will impact your life positively. Shalom Femi www.femi-fasanya.blogspot.com
Chapter 1
God’s time, is it the best?
Recently, I heard a comment made by one of the youths in one the denominations of churches in Nigeria; I really didn’t get the issue they were discussing on, only the response did I hear. The response was that God’s time is the best. This statement is true; I strongly believe in the concept of divine timing. However, on that particular day, I had unease in my spirit when she made the statement. The unease wasn’t because of the statement, but the impression that the statement will make in the lives of the people. It’s easy to believe that God’s time is coming while His time is already waiting for you and me for sometime. It’s so easy to spiritualize the stagnancy in our lives by giving the excuse that God is to blame for it. Whether we accept it/not, often time when we talk about God’s time, we are indirectly blaming Him for the outcome of our lives. If you don’t want to end like many singles, who blame God for their single state, you need to change the way you are thinking. In the monthly text that I sent last month (August), I wrote that, ‘Your life will navigate in the direction of your thought; so if you don't like were you are heading, don't spend too much time praying. CHANGE YOUR THOUGHT.’ Some singles are still waiting on God’s time at 30years and above, yet people who are despised and not expected to get married are settling down in their homes with their families.
I have seen women who should be praying and fasting for a husband, married; while those that are pretty are still praying that a man will come their way. Here is a true life story to buttress this point… Kenneth is a good looking young man, whom many ladies desire to get married to; he’s tall, handsome and has a promising future. When you meet him, one of the attributes you will like about him is his ability to make people be at ease; you will not but enjoy his presence. Everyone was on the look out for the lady he will get married to; they had seen him with women, some of whom they consider to be promising partners. However, Kenneth pulled a surprise on people when he showed with a lady that no one knew, but they had met during their service year. She was not the kind of lady that people would have expected him to be involved with, she was neither tall nor good looking and she has tribal marks on her face that make one feel that she was attacked my a wild animal. What surprises everyone the most is the way that Kenneth was always beaming around her; it was evident that he had found love, and not long afterward they got married. Till date he still treats his wife like a princess; while people wonder why such a good looking man could have gotten married to such a lady. I guess that you are familiar with stories like this; where you see a good looking man/woman married to a person that is not physically attractive and you wander what is happening.
Chapter 2
3 truths I have discovered.
Truth 1
Everyone has a disadvantage and advantage- The word beautiful and ugly shows an advantage and a disadvantage. A beautiful person is advantaged in the area of looks, but there are areas of disadvantages in the life of the person that can destroy the advantage that the person has. Ugliness is a disadvantage in the area of looks, but there are advantages that the person can make use of that will cover up for the disadvantage that the person has. One truth that you need to get into your system is never celebrate anyone and look down on yourself, usually what you are celebrating is his strength compared to your weakness; that is not fair because he has disadvantage were you are at an advantage.
Truth 2
Beauty/ugliness is a relative term- I have come to a conclusion that there’s no ugly person on the face of the earth. The reason that has led me to make this conclusion stems from what I call ugly that someone else call beautiful. It implies that you may be good looking, yet to people you’re ugly. A Nigerian adage says, ‘Your character is really your beauty and not your looks.’ If you check out the character of those that you call ugly who are married and compare it to those that are beautiful yet unmarried, you will see the reality behind this statement.
Truth 3
The state of your heart determines the state of your life- We all carry an aura around us, which can have a fragrant/pungent effect on people. If things go wrong with the state of a person’s heart, it often makes the person carry a pungent air around one that drives people away. The state of your heart is superior to the gifts/advantage you may have over others. David got the throne not because he was the best, but he had a heart; so he was a man after God’s heart. Show me a person with a good heart, I will show you a person who will have suitors fight to win the heart and hand of the person in marriage. Show me a person with a good heart, I will show you a person who can keep a relationship and make it end in a successful marriage.
Chapter 3
4 state of the heart that makes beautiful people ugly
State 1
Heart filled with anger- Whenever I counsel singles that have challenges keeping a partner, I always look out for anger and over 80% of the times I find it there. When a heart is filled with anger, that person will not be able to attract/keep a partner. Anger is a subtle destroyer. Meet a single, who can’t keep a partner, you’ll likely find a person who is angry with his/her parent(s).
State 2
Heart filled with pride- The English adage is true that says, ‘Pride comes before a fall.’ There is a way that been advantaged makes one proud and cocky. It can also make one choosy and insolent. Watch the decision of a proud person especially on the issue of relationship; it’s often the wrong one. A friend said to me that if you see a lady who is matured for marriage yet ain’t, often time it’s because of pride. He told me his story thus… He was in love with a lady many years ago and would have loved to get married to her. The lady was beautiful and intelligent (a medical student); what pissed him off was the way the lady treats him when he came calling. She practically ignore him and treat him with disdain, until he couldn’t take it no more and he moved on.
State 3
Heart filled with unforgiveness- Try walking straight looking backwards; you’ll discover that it’s impossible. Another interesting thing that you’ll discover is that you’ll end up going around in the direction of your head. My advice to singles is, forgive and let go of the man/lady that may have broken in your heart in the past; the person has only given you the opportunity to find someone better. However, unforgiveness will not let you see the better person.
State 4
An unwise heart- Meet an unwise person and you have met one who will not be able to keep whatever he/she has. If you meet a good looking single not married, watch out for a wise heart, it’s likely it’ll be missing.
Chapter 4
Lack of wisdom reveals itself in the following ways…
Ways lack of wisdom is revealed 1
Unguarded speech- Watch a person who can say whatever is on his/her heart the way it is; you have met a fool going no where. I heard a single say once, when she is angry, she can say anything (i.e. pour out her heart the way she feels) to anyone. I concluded that that was one of the reasons she wasn’t married; who will want to get married to a woman who has no moral restrain when she’s expressing herself.
Ways lack of wisdom is revealed 2
Weak disposition- No woman wants to stay in a relationship that the man isn’t in charge; every woman unconsciously like a man who has a mind of his own and can express it and even impose it. A man who is not in charge in his relationship shouldn’t blame his girl when she leaves him for a man she considers to be strong and matured to handle her.
Ways lack of wisdom is revealed 3
Not improving on oneself- I feel that every single should strive to do self improvement especially in the area of academics; a beautiful face with a dull brain is valued little; a good look without brains is a disaster that is about to happen.