Galveston Wizard, Volume #6: End of Ages

Vol.. #6

Galveston Wizard Periodical

G’Wiz

www.galvestonwizard.com www.myspace.com/galvestonwizard

Your first issue? Read up! You’re already five issues behind!

“End of Ages”
On Keeping A Young Mind
Something from Nothing
Page 5

On Keeping a Young Mind8 Page
Imagine an Island
Page 10

More!

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Fridays and Saturdays, Doors open at 5, Close at 10:30 Tuesdays Ch l Charley thru Fridays says Doors open at 11, Close at 2 'Gimme another glass of Pinot' at

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Reservations Preferred Cash or Check Only
We know you’ve seen the outside of

Located at RESTA URANTP and ITA LIAN 31stTA Ave TA

lla

Riptide is all about boards. Surf, Skate or Skim, they have what you are looking for. The store is located at 27th and Broadway. With a wide variety of surfboards and skateboards made “in house”, you won’t find another shop like it anywhere. As people walk through the door, they are greeted with a feeling of nostalgia. The walls are decorated with surfboards and skateboards from the 60’s and 70’s. People come from all over Texas to check out the “skate history“ display. With over fifteen years of skating and surfing experience, they can help you with whatever you need . So swing by to get yourself a new stick, be it your first one or just another addition to your collection. Don’t forget To reserve your lessons, call 832-236-5484 to check out the core surf and skate apparel only Trained instructor provides all of the equipment. Riptide has to offer. Stop by today. And tell them Sessions focus on learning the basics of surfing and safety in the ocean. that the Galveston Wizard sent ya!

but it’s time for you to

check the inside out!

Surf Lessons!

r Baughn Baughn giirll Baughn girl
TM

WINNER!
You must be!
You are apparently reading your Galveston Wizard Cover-To-Cover! It’s the only way to do it!

YOU ARE A

Want more? Got an idea? Got something to say?
“Everybody wants to be a Baughn Girl.”
Next wave crashing soon.
Great for in case your electricity gets cut! Due to hurricanes....or in case you don’t get to the bill in time! Don’t let it happen! Keep up with it!

Say it thru the Galveston Wizard! Email us your ideas, pics, articles, rants, or anything else you think your fellow man could do with hearing at [email protected]

Enjoy new quests with the

Galveston Wizard!
(Hint: Pay attention!)

A strong palette is needed... both to hold the buttloads of issues we printed, and for the reader to truly appreciate the wide range of flavors in their free publication! Swirl it around in your mind.

“Venture forth, bold readers.”

Load ‘em up, move ‘em out! Raw-hide! (and soon drenched in sweat!)

PSA: We at the Galveston Wizard would like to reiterate our pledge to keep our “bundle cords” cut, and our reader’s minds “Cutting Edge”

www.galvestonwizard.com

A Wizard Is Nothing Without His Staff
Publisher David Torkelson Editor In Chief David Torkelson Contributors David Torkelson Hoi Polloi Joe Bob Captain Chinbeard Marc Phillips Jamie Steichen David Stanowski Jason Gorham Rick Bacon Brandon Baughn Arlessa Wise Photography David Torkelson Marc Phillips Jamie Steichen Advertising David Torkelson Linda Sivy Design/Layout David Torkelson Joe Bob Hoy Polloi Marc Phillips Distribution David Torkelson Web Wizards David Torkelson Isaac Almaguer Bryant (lost your number!) Silkscreen Wizard Press Gorilla Brave Rogues Chance Weatherly Dirty Sanchez Peter Frutiger

WHAT IS IT YOU SEEK?

Web site: www.galvestonwizard.com Email: [email protected] Phone: 409.621.2864 Mail: P.O. Box 3467 Galveston Texas 77552-3467

Greetings From the Galveston Wizard,
Our paths have met yet again! We are with you always, and know that though the realm is not without it’s shortcomings, Good things are on the horizon! We proudly present our 6th installment for your reading pleasure! Pay attention as we continue our quest thru the many diverse and unique realms that Galveston has to offer. So many wizards in so many realms of expertise! Working to guide and enlighten readers bold enough to brave pages much like the ones that you hold now! Are you ready to begin the quest? There are many interesting and important things that you would be wise to pay attention to. Know your realm and your wisdom will open uncountable doors of possibility. You need make only the effort. You have not because you ask not. Remember, you may be a wizard in countless realms, but there are still more countless realms that you know not of. Be not afraid. The Galveston Wizard will in no way attempt to change who you are. We merely hope to show you who others are and how similar thier plight is to yours. In what realms do you feel that you could offer Wizardly observations, insights, or feelings on things important d to those of us who occupy this realm, and it’s visitors. y Time is of the essence. We will hopefully hear good word from you soon. Thank you for following the wizard.

Criteria for Submissions
Want to submit something for publication in the Galveston Wizard? Here are some things you should keep in mind. Be legible. (Typed email submissions only, please! Submissions may be edited for content or readability.) 200-400 words for Editorial Article Submissions, Little as one sentence for letter to wizard. Be optimistic. If you present a problem, offer solutions. What’s going wrong, what’s going right? Sending artwork? Make copies. Do not send originals as items will not be returned. (email as high quality pdf) Send Top Quality stuff. No blurry, small, or otherwise unpublishable pictures. Highest quality jpg or pdf, please! Give details. If you do provide a picture, be sure to include your name, contact, caption, and other pertinent information. Email submissions to us at: thewiz@ galvestonwizard.com (preferred) Sending Something snail mail? P.O. Box 3467, Galveston, Tx 77552-3467. Questions, Comments and Ideas may also be directed to David Torkelson at 409.621.2864

Submission Deadline!
Are Are Are we all ready to take it to the next r all read o take l ready eady dy ke th next the ext x xt level? level? Here goes... ve vel? re goe goes... oes You v Yo ve ow o deadlines. You’ve now got dead es You’ve now got deadlines. ot ead es. adlines s You, the reader! You, the reader! o he eader! Just send the stuff you’ve been meaning Just s st s to, and we’ll put it out there! Businesses? We’re ready to run with you. Our readers keep up! (Up on finding all of the exciting and unique things they can do here. Time is ticking!

August 6th

-Galveston Wizard
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End of Ages

G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard We look forward to hearing from our readers from the realm! Take the time to send us a note! We sure do appreciate all of the continued support and encouragements! [email protected]
a response. My partners, employees and I see it as our civic duty to work with and assist the USPS with the continued operation of this facility due to our years of involvement with the West Isle community. We all feel very strongly that everyone should do their part to bring issues such as this into the public arena for discussion, rather than to let a beauracratic agency set policy based on a lack of research and understanding of the public they serve. Is it in the best interests of the growing and vital West Galveston Island business, resort and residential communities to allow the USPS to abandon this facility or offer reduced service? 30 years of providing a positive operation and satisfied customers say “no”. Valerie S. Eagle & Gay Fundling

Galveston Wizard,

Thoughts from Readers,
to preserving the Post Office, working over the past 3 years to accomplish a fair and viable lease arrangement with USPS, to no avail. My company now leases the building and has diligently and fairly tried to continue and complete this process since February of this year. It has been very frustrating to delegate our work day to assisting the USPS customers, staff and management only to note a lack of understanding of their own operation. Changes in services offered by the Post Office, the status of P.O. Box holders and receipt of packages for West End residents have resulted in many irate customers. We frankly, are unable to answer questions and concerns because of either lack of information or misinformation given to us by postal authorities. It was not until intervention by Jamaica Beach Mayor, Vic Pierson, and City Council members, plus Representative Ron Paul’s office, that temporary measures were put into place to provide mail delivery to current PO box customers. This arrangement expires on July 4, 2007. Currently, limited postal services

Thanks for putting our picture in there!! So many of our friends have called us about our picture, so it’s definitely getting read! The manager at CVS even said he saw me in it. One of our customers at Mario’s left some copies for us to give out. Everyone at work got a copy. Keep up the good work. Dear Wizard, Thank you for this opportunity to respond to your interest in preserving the USPS Post Office here at Jamaica Beach. For nearly 30 years, West Galveston Island has benefited from the full service USPS Federal postal facility located in the historic office center at the entrance to Jamaica Beach. It has been mine and my company’s position, based on the overwhelming request of the West Galveston community representing over onethird of our Island’s tax base, that we work with the USPS administration to continue the operation of this very important facility. As well, the owners of our building, the WD Grover family, have been committed

are being rendered from 12:30 TO 1:30 MF. Residents of the West End are sent to the Bob Lyons station to purchase stamps, send registered mail, receive packages, etc. It takes an hour and a half to conduct a simple postal transaction. West Galveston residents and business owners faced with traffic congestion, energy conservation and travel time and distance are demanding the USPS assist them by maintaining existing services at the facility. Also to be considered is our significant senior population who cannot comfortably avail themselves of postal services at the distant Bob Lyons facility, already seemingly overwhelmed with attending to its existing service population. We feel that the ideal solution is for the USPS to staff and maintain a full service branch at this location. So far, we have been told that is not an option. We have filed an application with USPS to oversee and staff a facility similar to what we have had all of these years and are unsure when we will receive

Managing Members GALVESTON ISLAND REAL ESTATE, LLC
16602 San Luis Pass Rd. (O) 409 737 2020 (C) 540 537 1808

We see big things for Galveston...

To Receive a complete Galveston Island Meeting Planner Guide, Contact the GalvestonIslandConvention and Visitors Bureau Toll free at (866)505-4456. Let us help promote it!

...Huge gatherings of like-minded people doing interesting stuff! That’s what we want to see, anyway. Huge convention centers allow the space, and the island presents the opportunity. What would you have in a convention center space? Anyone who knows conventions and conferences know that they are exploding with opportunity. What about concert events? We have ideas for events all of the time! Some close friends have expressed interest in event planning and promotion for your benefit! That’s right! If we work at bringing you all an events, teaming up with other businesses and vendors, it’s up to YOU whether the event is a success.... and ultimately if there will be more. (and phase 2, at that) Buy a calendar, mark it! We will do our best to guide you thru some of the businesses, activities, and people of interest as seen by the Worn out from all of the thinking, we drove down to Olympia Grill and ate Galveston Wizard. Crawfish Boil? Awesome New Years Party? Dinner. The Belly Dancer had our friend distracted from his appetizer! We What are you thinking? Email us and let us in on it! expect at least a few free gyros for the shameless plug. How ‘bout it?

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End of Ages

G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

With the recent deregulation of the electric industry, you have more “power” than ever to take control of your electric bill. (pun intended) Wrap your mind around this one. One company generates the electricity, then it is deliverd by the CenterPoint People (the trucks that you see), Then you have a company that manages your bill. • Save up to 15% off of your Electric Bill EVERY MONTH. • No cost to switch. • No Commitments Only 12.99 cents a kilowatt. (look at your current bill for what you are paying now, or get a rate quoted to you compared to your current rate. Invest time and save some money! Money making opportunity also available for helping your friends save money too!

DO YOU USE ELECTRICITY?

Start saving today! Click around at

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to see what it’s all about, or call Debbie Roy at 409.939.4175 for more details on this great opportunity!

Backyard Garden Tour
It was a glorious sunny day. A Sun-day, at that. We had scored some press passes from Lynette, and we were going to see what the buzz was all about with the event. The event we’re going to unveil to you was presented by Clean Galveston. (More Info, call 409.762.3363) Participation of 11 different homes, people, and groups with amazing green thumbs and diverse concept backyards made this day one to remember! A boring swing set sitting in a ill-kept lawn could be two doors down, but you step into the next backyard on the list of participant addresses, and you are transported to another world! Now that’s taking ownership! Elaborate paths leading alongside amazing fountains, plant clusters, and brilliant flower arrangements, and friendly faces. Lob out a question to any one of the architects of these amazing Backyard Gardens, and they will give you even more detail into the amazing and diverse worlds you find yourself transported to. Help us promote your event then cover it!

See more Pics in Living Color on page 16!

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End of Ages

G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

“Impress your friends!”

Become a Card-Carrying Life Saver!*
Galveston EMS offering Community Outreach
to any private , public or community organization that would like information on: y information om

*where to get CPR training *”when to Call” EMS (911) *information on a variety of Medical conditions, including -heart attack, stroke diabetes etc. *EMS education for all ages -(i.e, Red E. Fox program up to 3rd grade, Vials of life for life r de, Vials of life for ials a Seniors, Bike Safety etc.

*CPR training at all levels can be obtained thought the American Heart Association or American Red Cross.

Learn CPR:
ule lv ul Galveston lvesto S t utreach To schedule Galv on EMS for a Community Outreach event, please contact: schedule Gal Community Outreach

Knowing how to perform CPR, and initiating it right away, will increase a person’s survival time until paramedics and doctors can take over. CPR does work, and when initiated within four to six minutes, the rate of survival is approximately 10%. The life you can save with CPR training may be a loved one or a close friend. Aren’t they worth it?

Thomas Thomas E. Leigh, Sr. m Le gh Sr. Leigh, Training C rdinator ng Coordinat g Coordinator na Galveston EMS n EMS (409) 765-2504 ph 765-2504 ph 50 (409) 765-2503 fax [email protected]

(Events? Yes, Please!) When you call, Don’t forget! His last name is pronounced like “LEE” as in Raleigh.

We wanted to take a little time...
... to thank everyone who attended and supported the 20th Annual Aids Benefit Tour 2007. The hard work of many local and out-of-town entertainers helped raised close to $6,000. Thanks to the following clubs The Undercurrent, 3rd Coast Beach Bar, Pink Dolphin, Robert’s lafitte & Charlie Burgers for participating in this years tour. As an entertainer of 24 years born & raised on Galveston, Island for 49 years. I believe in giving back to the community that has given me so many opportunities in my life! To all my supporters I missed this year, so much more could have been raised if time would not have gone so fast! To the Galveston Daily News, The Galveston Wizard, The TWT magazine & Outsmart magazine, thank you for your support. To the staff and clients at A.C.C.T. I will always be around for you as long as you need me.Remember always support those that support you! -Misty Valdez (your island diva)

Got a T-shirt idea? (Show us the money!)
Upcoming Parties, Anniversaries, Events, Benefits, Teams, “Just Because”, or anything else that you would like to commemorate? Make some memorabilia! Wear it like a billboard for your Business, Company Shirts, Promotional Merchandise, More!

“We will make them for you. ”
(And they are cheaper by the dozen)

Graphic Designers on hand for custom work! Help us help you!

G’Wiz Enterprises 409.621.2864

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End of Ages

G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

On Keeping A Young Mind
Aging is a part of life. It’s what life is all about. What we make of aging makes us who we are. We are born. We learn how to learn. We try to learn everything we can. We keep going and going until, over time, many of us begin to no longer desire new or different activities, outings or opportunities. We grow up. We pay the bills. (barely) Work the mills. Guest Stars in Cheers, some would say. island? They’re not! Think it’s too late? It isn’t! The opposite holds true! So are you young minded? Are you open to discover new experiences, ideas, points of view? There are many exciting things out there? Are you ready to feel like a child again? Trying to grasp an amazing new world! How much do you scoff only because you know you’d really like, but never took the time! I-Pods? MySpace? PS3? Karate? Getting the band back together? Surf Lessons? Back to School? Spanish?

Words from the WIZe!
(Yes, we spelled it like that to be cool.)
You’re never too old to become younger. Mae West US movie actress (1892 - 1980) The denunciation of the young is a necessary part of the hygiene of older people, and greatly assists in the circulation of their blood. Logan Pearsall Smith, Afterthoughts (1931) “Age and Death” In case you’re worried about what’s going to become of the younger generation, it’s going to grow up and start worrying about the younger generation. Roger Allen The dead might as well try to speak to the living as the old to the young. Willa Cather US novelist (1873 - 1947) It is an illusion that youth is happy, an illusion of those who have lost it; but the young know they are wretched for they are full of the truthless ideal which have been instilled into them, and each time they come in contact with the real, they are bruised and wounded. W. Somerset Maugham, ‘Of Human Bondage’, 1915 English dramatist & novelist (1874 - 1965)
Check out a near endless supply of wisdom and observation on all aspects of living at WWW.quotationspage. COM. Good stuff!

Team Misery want you to be depressed and downtrodden about it all. They are not interested in opportunity. They are just fine with things how they are. No need for updates, changes, possibilities, What do you find to be a great “mind opportunities... younging” activity? What do you do that We can all to easily settle into a pattern, a makes you feel young? mindset. Once established, everything else coming in is compared to that particular subset we’ve created. Galveston is a certain way in your mind and not much will change that...in fact, maybe your thinking is what is guiding how Galveston really is growing, maybe it is ALL in your mind?

The young have so much to learn. They are headstrong and foolish. Will they just listen? Share your insight and observations thru us to our readers! We will try to keep an open mind as to what is on your mind. Share your history on the island. The cool insights to what makes Galveston great Think you’re goals and dreams are out to you! We’ll help spread the word! of reach on The elderly can bring the young wisdom t h e just as the young can restore vitality to their elders. Respect your elders, but also don’t underestimate your young’s potential. Help us relate! Age is merely a number.Be inquisitive. Email us at thewiz@ galvestonwizard. com

http://www.state.sc.us/ddsn/pubs/hinjury/sec3.htm
At an island fast food restaurant, Somebody apparently put a piece of gum on the screen that shows you what you have just ordered. We wondered what exactly was on the mind of that individual as they did that. Better than under my sneaker I guess, but it looks like you’re making more work for others! Boo! If you stepped in gum, would you get mad or upset? Or would you be relieved to get it back?

Hmmm. . . . .

GUM

“Enjoy Being”
Send us your observations, ideas, and experiences to so that we can relate it for you to others!

What if it took a celebrity like Paris Hilton getting the proverbial “book thrown at her” to get us to realize that at some point along the way, we all might not be treated fairly. Judgments affected or based solely on our celebrity, age, sex, race, sexual orientation, or other traits most might not even consider might not be the most fair! Roll with the punches, “kill “em with kindness,” as they say..., and show them the best revenge is a life lived well. Break the false molds that they hold in their minds. Surprise somebody today by being nicer! Avoid Pitfalls and Distraction.

[email protected]

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End of Ages

G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

KING ME!
Here are the pictures I took at the Human Checkers game. Enjoy! It is going to take several emails to get all of the pictures to you...hopefully they will all get to you! -Lauren Harris Getting together. Meeting New People. Doing Something.

How are you playing the game? Are you learning the rules? Are you figuring out what works and what doesn’t? Human Checkers, People! It isn’t just about winning or losing, it’s how you’re playing the game. This fun and growing group of friends make unique times happen out of thin air! (Catch a Jumping the Shark event? Why Not?) As the Human Checkers game continues, force jumps initiate double jumps, the board begins to clear. (You had to “Jump” Them...) King Me! (Tiara awarded) The game gets serious. The last few of the red and black human checkers are plotting their final moves, and you can’t help but think “how cool” that this happened. (Even though the Red Team was soundly and swiftly defeated by the ruthless and surprisingly cunning Black Team.) Will there be a rematch?

Jump!

Jump!

Jump!

Jump!

King Me!

You don’t start with
the roof.
Ready to apply for a mortgage? Let’s get you going on one today.

Imagine An Island!
What if we had a Roller Skating Rink? Kids of all ages like skating. I’m sure thair are a fair amount of adults that can “shoot the duck” and show off the roller disco moves. It could be used day and night for things like roller hockey, ladies roller durby, and music shows. It could be in an indoor /outdoor well lit, busy area. Like one of blank spots on the seawall. Those spots just attrack trash and trouble and with a money- maker that is safe and good exercise you could not go wrong. So why do we have big open ugly areas with nothing? These areas need to be fixed and used to dress up the seawall. Let’s leave the strand to the historians. The seawall can be fun in the sun for everyone. Tune in next time for, “ Island Drive-In Movie!”

Sometimes a great idea just needs some help!
What cool things do you want for Galveston Island? Let us put it out your visions out there for everyone to think about! Email us at [email protected]

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G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard
For instance, you could tie one on with the Jack Daniel’s girls, or watch these women tug’n a rubber chicken. From there, you might amble neath one of the many tents and check out the talent on the dance floor. Yes, I realize there’s two shots of the same hottie over there, but her talent was palpable, truly. The guys among em - not so much. Healthy appetites, though. Surely you’d want to visit Budweiser Girl, Amanda Daigle, touch up the buzz with a brew and spout ignorance like, “That’s a nice necklace.” While in the vicinity, you could luck out and find a table of fun-loving Latinas drunker than you are. Finally, if you’re a journalist, you should never forget that your readership comes to expect certain things from you, even when you cover charity events. Hunt down the tit shot on your way back to the truck. And drive safely. It’s a long way home. M. Phillips And don’t be shy about asking someone (several people, if you have to) what happens to two tons of barbecue and all the trimmings after it’s served and digested. Inquiring minds need to know.

Yaga’s Got Gamey on the Pier
BBQ Cookoff to benefit kids

Pier 21, May 11 - It was the Friday Night VIP Party before Saturday’s judging for “best of” title in 4 categories of outdoor cooking. I mean, the website says there were 4. No, I don’t know who won. Didn’t go Saturday. I was tired. Let’s see...what else? The whole thing was for charity, which is why we all felt obligated to drink as much booze as possible, which was free after you got past the gate. Oh, and nobody was allowed to cook any spotted owls or endangered rainforest shit. That’s the upshot. There’s only so much you can write about BBQ. The rest is in the taste buds. The rub is, you had to be there for that. I brought back some pictures for our readers, though. Here’s one of the Justin Sane Co. Team dissecting some critter for the pit: And that’s about the only shot of meat we need. There were a few other things going on...

feed the kids!
GALVESTON, TX- Galveston Independent School District is providing meals for approximately 1,200 to 1,500 children per day as part of its 2007 Summer Food Service Program. The office of Child Nutrition will operate this program beginning on Monday, June 4 through Friday, August 17 at 20 facilities. The program is funded through the Texas Department of Agriculture. so many children,” said GISD Child Nutrition Director Jennifer Douglas. “We encourage parents or guardians to take advantage of this summer meal program and we appreciate the support of this community in allowing us to expand our serving sites.” Free meals will be served Monday through Friday to children ages one to 18 years of age, regardless of income.

“It is very rewarding to be able to Meals will be provided at the provide hot, nutritious meals for following sites: (see full listing and

food service times online at www. Care, Moody Day School, YMCA, galveston-schools.org, in the green GISD has expanded this program GISD News Box) to include four sites on Bolivar Burnet Elementary School, , Boys & Peninsula including Crenshaw Girls Club, Wright Cuney Park, Nia- Elementary/Middle School, Gulf Cultural Center (St. Vincent’s Home) Coast Market, First Stop Grocery, Weis Middle School, Children’s Port Bolivar Market. Place, Island Community Center, The district provides a hot breakfast Odyssey Academy, Ball High and will vary its lunch menu with School, Deborah’s Daycare, Koala various sandwiches including Kare, Oleander Homes, Anderson hamburgers, rib sandwiches Academy, Explorama Kids World, and other entrees. For more Magnolia Homes, Silver Spoons, information, contact Child Nutrition Bouldin Day Care,First Step Day at 766-5162.

Have you ever seen a lonely Galveston Wizard sitting there out in the elements, without a reader to call it’s own? You pick it up, feeling it between your fingers. You unfold it and admire it’s incredible cover, features and design. But you don’t dare open it. You have a copy of your own at home. You look around...This one goes to soemone else! What stranger can I bestow this Volume Upon? Cool ideas, stories, insights, businesses and more! We too have the same passion about getting the Galveston Wizard to our readers! We’re shopping heavy duty newspaper bins so readers can find the latest Volume with ease. Wanna sponsor a bin? We’ll promote your busienss with the bins as well as get our issues out there! Call us at

“Please.You can’t just do nothing at all.”

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12 End of Ages

G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

C Check it out!
Enjoy Outdoor Dining under the Palapa

&

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Serving Tues. Fri. 10am - 6pm, Sat. 9am - 4pm
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The Noshers review:
Star Drug Store 510 23rd St. 409-766-7719 The other the day the two Noshers tried the fare at the newly reopened Star Drug Store, a Galveston legend. After undergoing a five year renovation this historic gem is finally back in business, not as a drug store, but as a downtown lunch spot. The Star is owned by the Tilts family. Marty and his daughter Natalie, who is also the manager, did all the work on the Star Drugstore is a great place to relax with place and what a grand job they did. friends, eat some good food in a historic setting, and reminisce about the good ole times in GIn its heyday the Star was known for its lunch town, when downtown was THE place to be. counter, where you could see your food being See you there! prepared and catch up on the latest local gossip. by Robert Taylor and Tim Thompson That aspect has not changed. When you walk in and are greeted by the friendly staff, you feel like you have been gone back to a time when life was less hectic. From the atmosphere inside to the hearty hamburgers, sandwiches and salads (and lets not forget the malts and shakes made the old-fashioned way) Star offers a pretty substantial menu of lunchtime fare. Do not forget to try the Star’s signature soup, a homemade, hearty tomato basil. They also offer a good breakfast menu.

Do you
e think we found him off f 29th and S 1/2! Check it ut for yourself!

Seek the Buddha?

“Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it. Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders. Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it. “

on path?”

-The Buddha

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G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard
happening on the Strand. I listened, agreed and made mental notes as I looked around at all of the adorable infant, toddler and children’s clothing displayed with obvious attention to detail. Rod knows Galveston and the Strand. As I told Mark, I’ll be back there as soon as I’m in need an original outfit for someone’s kiddo. I must’ve sighed. If only our advertisers, and those debating whether to advertise with us, could see what I see when I go out on the town. Dozens upon dozens of knees and elbows behind Wizards. I’m not really in the mood for drinking today, I thought, and Mark probably saw it. Nevertheless, my bartender gave me great advice. He told me to just keep trying and come back to visit with him anytime. I tipped him big. I drove to Hummel’s on my journey home. Bill Hummel is one of the nicest store owners I know. Not only does he know what kind of water I drink, what deli meat I like, he also knows how to read my facial expressions. After telling me to smile, he asked what was wrong. I told him that I was beginning to feel like I was failing Wizard advertisers because I’m not having much luck today. He laughed and reminded me of the wonderful ad I just sold him. That did it. I smiled. Sometimes it takes a slap across the head to snap me out of it, with reminders of sweet success – mine and his and all of us lucky enough to live on an island in summer. I’ll leave you with this. The most common sentiment I hear from vendors is they don’t have additional money to allocate for advertising expenses. I keep telling them that “If you build it, they will come” only works in the movies. Right? The rest of us have to actually tell people where we are, then they’ll come. It’s something to think about. Again, I’ll mention The Galveston Wizard eagerly pursues ongoing relationships with potential advertisers and sponsors to help inform its readership of the products and services available in Galveston. I’m bound and determined to find those relationships, so this time I’ll help myself a little. Please feel free to contact us at (409) 621-2864 and tell The Wizard to send Linda right over. You know, “If you call, she will come” and all.

I Like Bartenders ~Linda Sivy I

t stands to reason that they have the best stories, but the good bartenders also know when to lend an ear. I went to the Captain’s Table to chat with Mark Willcut, the bartender, a few days after my first week out. Mark asked me how it was going. I shared with him some of my adventures on selling ads for The Wizard. I told Mark that this job is my most rewarding one but I’m sad over the responses some vendors give me to scoot me out of their doors. After Mark poured me a tall glass of water, I sang like a canary. I told him of the worst to best. I enlightened him of a business owner that reamed me for 15 minutes on why The Wizard should “clean up their act”. The business owner was staring at last month’s tits shot the whole time she commented on how we needed to repent. I couldn’t believe what she was protesting. Was she for real? I asked if she’d had the pleasure of reading The Wizard yet? The fun-loving island spirit, the absence of discrimination among our pages? No, she hadn’t. Oh well, one reader lost to the Legion of Decency because of a pair of boobs. It’s the price of entertainment, I guess. Then I proudly told Mark of the day I ventured over to Woody’s and experienced the best show ever. I was sitting there minding my own business, cooling off with a glass of ice water, as coincidence would have it, when the band started to play. Rick Lee was so talented. He enticed Sonya Skarvan from her work station so professionally, sat her on a bar stool, and placed his electric guitar in her lap. He dropped to his knees and started licking his guitar strings while Sonja threw her arms back behind her and giggled. The crowd went nuts and I laughed so hard. Moms, dads and kids were all present. I thought it to be fun, harmless entertainment – and my only regret is that we don’t have pictures of it to print. The music was great. Rick tongued every string. But one or two snapshots would’ve fit nicely into our unclean act. I think I also mentioned to Mark a recent educational visit downtown. I wandered into Room 217 (23rd & Strand) and had a fantastic “old school Galveston” chat with Rod Brown. Rod gave me a local update of the latest things

Next To Joe’s on Seawall, Behind the Commodore and the Dutch Kettle.

There is a perfect plot of land for an impromptu soccer game. 3 on 3? 4 on 4? Bring a few balls, your gear, some cones and get started soon!
be respectful. bring friends! Set a time and date and start

playing!
We’ve done so hf much for so long with so little, that now it feel feels e o like we can do ost anything g almost a thi with nothing.
Randal on Broadway wants to remind others that “Jesus Loves Them.” Joey Collier at The Press Box! Did you know they have great food AND Joey? You do now! 24th and Post Office.

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G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

Server
Underground
Fake the Funk with Rick Bacon
reetings and salutations Wizard readers. Before I get into it, I have several shout outs to make -- “Pirate” Mike Carrillo, Jackie “Boudainface” Hoosier, Alan “Swastika” Swies and all my other food service collegues. Ok, that’s taken care of and I can say what needs to be said. When all of my friends heard I was writing an article, they all said, “Gee, are you gonna write about waiting tables?” In response, I give a resounding

G

NEGATIVE. I hate every last thing about work. I hate being at work, I hate thinking about work, I hate breaking my back at work, I hate talking about work outside of work, I hate seeing where I work when I’m not at work, I hate getting up for work, I hate getting ready for work and most especially I hate the daily (sometimes twice daily) commute to work. Occasionaly, I will go out to the bars with co-workers to

unwind and drink the stench of work from my soul. On most occasions, this is exactly what the doctor ordered, but inevitably somebody will try and engage everyone with conversation that has everything to do with the very things we are all trying to drink away. I think that there should be a penalty for such an arrogant buzz killer as shop talk. At the Poop Deck, I believe I will start throwing people over the rail in these

circumstances. I just don’t want to hear about what Joe Schmoe said to Mary Starry on the expo line during the rush. I don’t want to hear about what such and such said would happen if Harry Hop-along wears the wrong uniform again. I go to work to make money, I then do what I have to so I can leave. So I guess this turned out to be a column about work (kindof), but it is the last of it’s kind.

Got an article idea? Powerful insights or observations for your fellow Server. Pst. Send it to us!

First Reader Appreciation Night A HUGE Success!
A special thanks to everyone who participated in our first-of-itskind Galveston Wizard Reader Appreciation Night! Readers were treated to free samples of in-house, delicious homemade wine samples from D’Vine Wine (who hosted the event at their shop off 23 and Strand), and also some choice selections from Chef Becky from Speculoos Patisserie and Cafe (located on 23rd and Strand as well). These businesses teamed up with us to bring you a unique and fun evening! Wildly upset that you missed our first Galveston Wizard Reader Appreciation Night? Not to worry. We’ve planned another one for your enjoyment!
Custom-Design wine bottles for your special events. Commemorate the occasion! Show some support! Meet other like-minded people that made the effort to show up! We look forward to seeing you there! Interested in learning a little about wines? Why not see what they have in store for you?

Second Chance!
Tuesday, July 31st
From 6-8
Three free samples with this ad A night to appreciate possibilities.
6-pack Jimmy can find a wine for 9 out of ten of the most stubborn miller lite fans. What an amazing night of mingling, sampling and gourmet snacking it was! Special thanks to everyone who made it! We’ hope to see the rest of you at our next one! Mark your calendars!

Free G.E.D.Classes
Registration begins: Mon Aug 20th, Classes begin: Mon, Sept 3rd. Court ordered students: 1 pm-4pm Tue-Wed-Thur For more information call:

Why not buy your loved one a Galveston Wizard Back Issue? You know you want one too!

Galveston College (409)944-4242
Ext. 488

College of the Mainland (409)938-1211
Ext. 294

www.galvestonwizard.com

Get em online at

“Earth,Wind and Fire”
photography by Ivan

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G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

Etiquette Advice Column
Captain, I have a problem. I am in the 11th grade and I have been with my girl for 8 months. I think I love this girl, but the other day, I found a barnacle on the hull of my dinghy. She is the only girl I have been with and I don’t want to lose her. I don’t know how to bring it up to her. what do I do? Well, barnacles don’t grow on boats that haven’t been in the water, savy? So if I was ye, I would see me physician, or at least ask somebody with glasses to look at it. There are alot of people with glasses near coffee houses, they must be pretty smart, because I never see them working. Sometimes, burying stuff be a good strategy. This ain’t one of those times; if you transmit a disease to somebody else without telling them, you may end up in prison. She may also be hidin’ somethin’ about the truth from ye. Ye need to set her down with big mug of grog -er, I mean, apple juice, and do some honest talkin’. Help Captain! I have a friend that is about 20 years older then me. We hang out, watch sports, and drink beer. He is a really good guy. Here is my problem: He’s a racist bastard. The things that come out of his mouth make me want to beat him to death. I try to just let it go but it gets really hard. What should I do? Ye can’t change some folk. Me thinks he be one of the folk ye can’t change. Ye can ask him politely to curb his mouth in public, but ye ain’t gonna change his beliefs. If he be disturbin’ ye too much, then ye might want to hack him to bits and throw him overboard...or find somebody else to drink with-whatever ye lan’lubbers do. Until next time,

Captain Chinbeard’s

Need advice?
GOOD!
I be full of it! Email me: chinbeard@ gmail.com

Captain Chinbeard

enjoy fresh fish from the gulf
Trying to think of something fun to cook and enjoyable to eat….check out Katie’s Seafood market located at Pier 19 on Harborside!! Katie’s has been in business since 1998 catching, importing and selling fresh seafood to Galvestonians, tourists and local restaurants, including Palms M&M, Pic’s on 45th, Rudy and Paco’s and more. In 1998 a fisherman, Keith Guindon, Buddy, decided he wanted to sell his own product so he bought a waterfront property and opened Katie’s Seafood Market. Patrons can purchase fresh seafood including fresh fish, shrimp, oysters, crabs as well as frozen calamari, lobster meat and tails and scallops. The prices at the market are very reasonable and the selection is extensive. The shrimp taste delightful and they are easy to prepare…an easy recipe for shrimp: simply sauté freshly minced garlic (invest in a garlic press you won’t regret it!!) with butter in a frying pan, add peeled shrimp and cook until the shrimp are white all the way through. Enjoy over a bed of pasta topped with a cheesy alfredo mushroom sauce and a steamed vegetable (see photo). Or if it’s a beautiful day and you want to enjoy the weather, put the peeled shrimp on a skewer and cook them on the grill. As you flip the shrimp skewers brush garlic butter sauce on them and voila!! What better way to enjoy a delicacy that we have on the island, that we may take for granted! Support local businesses and pay a visit Katie’s Seafood Market soon!! Call 409.763-8160 for more information! See you there!

Visit the website: www.katiesseafoodmarket.com
Where on the island are you?

Where on the island is this?

Take out the trash in your world! Eliminate clutter and garbage, and you free up more room for new possibilities.

Ann Crouch (owner) and Mark at The Captain’s Table. Check out their ad page 12.

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G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

Hurricane Season is underway...
...are you prepared?

A ramco
OUTSIDE BLINDS
5105 BROADWAY, Galveston, TX (409)762.9652 Toll Free 1-888-6-ARAMCO (1-888-627-2626) Owned & Operated Since 1938 By The Milan Family

Continued From Garden page 6

Jump into

Color!

The Galveston Farmers’ Market is providing free space to sell your homegrown fruits, vegetables and flowers. Contact Jacquelyn Tarpy-Stanowski at 409.621.2092, or email her at [email protected]

Attention Galveston Gardeners!

LET US PROMOTE YOUR EVENT OR ORGANIZATION!
We want to tell our readers about your events! We want to show them all sorts of things! We are a free publication to the reader, funded by advertising. If we can promote your event before it happens, it may even free us up time to actually check out the event we are promoting and we can report THAT back to our readers in the next issue! Give us the opportunity to increase awareness and interest in innovative businesses, people and organizations! Thank you for giving us the opportunity to do so! We’ll see you where it’s at! Call us at 409.621.2864 or email us at [email protected]

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G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

Galveston College

T-Shirts Magnets Stickers Coffee Mugs Home Decor & More

Giny Hogan Collection
“Original Watercolor Designs by Island Artist ”

www.zazzle.com/ginyhogan www.cafepress.com/ginyhogan www.printfection.com/ginyhogan

Rock Solid esults! R
• Prudential.com__ Yahoo!
The NUMBER 1 visited website in the world.

+

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a Regular or Large Combo at

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• Multi-Media Area Wide Campaign.
Driving home buyers to view your home.

LESS!

• 20 Years Marketing Background.
Hands on agent, working hard to meet your goals.

with this coupon.
Hrs: Mon-Fri 11:00 to 8:00 pm, Sat and Sun 11-3:00pm.

Kenneth S. Gluski, D.D.S., P.C
FAMILY DENTISTRY ORTHODONTICS

Jan McGovern Jan McGovern

409-419-0784
The Power of the Rock!

Valid only at 2221 Market St. Galveston
One coupon per customer per visit.

(409)765-9190

25th & K

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G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

ESCALATION!
by David Stanowsky
Sunday 24 June 2007 Escalation! In the military world, when one army acquires an additional 200 tanks, other armies usually feel compelled to add at least 200 tanks, to their arsenal, too; and possibly more. They call this; “escalation”. In the world of Rock and Roll, when one band adds something new to their performance, other bands often feel the need to keep up by adding the same thing, or surpassing what the first band did. They call this; “escalation”. A few weeks ago, Marty Monte informed me that he was going to change the calculus of performances at East Beach by using a “wall of sound” when Magazine played that weekend. True to his word, everyone noticed a big difference, and a ripple went out on the Galveston “music pond”, that “rocked all the boats”. The equation had indeed changed! last time I remember that kind of sound was at a Led Zeppelin concert, many years ago. Mark Lee set everyone straight, early in the first set, by stating, “If you think we are too loud; you are too old!” Enough said! This was a “fasten your seat belt”, because the sound is going to “put a part in your hair”, and a “dent in your forehead”, kind of a day! During the first break, Mark came over to say that he had read of Marty’s exploits, and had taken on the challenge to push the envelope even further! He calculated that he was pumping almost 7,000 watts through those eight cabinets, and there was no question that he had fully eclipsed Marty’s “wall of sound”! This was really over the top! It is what they call setting a new standard for sound at East Beach! The word unprecedented came to mind, more than once. Of course, this kind of sound is not going to work, at most other venues, but by playing East Beach, full out, “with the pedal to the metal”, they were able to really showcase what they are capable of doing. ears were still ringing, several people in the crowd rushed up on stage to congratulate the band, to ask for business cards, and to inquire about the where and when of their next performance. The word “Wow” was heard more than once! After the dust settled, only two questions remained: 1. When will Nite Energy being playing East Beach, again? 2. Will there be any further “escalation”, in this battle of the bands? I want to thank Marty, for starting this whole thing, in the first place, and Mark for pushing the envelope even further. These guys know how to “color outside the lines”. It is through these kinds of efforts that we break new ground in the world of Rock & Roll!

. . .and a ripple went out on the Galveston “music pond”, that “rocked all the boats”.

Saturday was the first chance for Nite Energy to play the fabled East Beach Pavilion, and we weren’t going to miss it. As soon If you haven’t seen Nite Energy, as we got out of the car, I could yet; check their schedule for an feel a new ripple on the pond! By Now, I don’t mean to imply that the time we were up on the deck, this was only about power. Those upcoming performance. I could see why it sounded so 7,000 watts were pumping out a different. We were staring down mighty fine musical performance! Check out David Stanowsky’s the barrel of eight large speaker two amazing resource With their two-guitar attack, and cabinets that were putting out exceptional vocal work, this is Web sites online at www. a sound that you would only one hell of a band!! thefinancialhelpcenter.com and expect to hear at a large-scale, outdoor Rock concert! In fact, the When it was all over, and our www.galvestonmusicscene.com Be sure to register your band’s dates, info, and of course your name! Check out www.galvestonmusicscene and use it to work for you!
UNBELIEVABLE MATH PROBLEM
Thanks Joe! Here is a math trick so unbelievable that it will stump you. Personally I would like to know who came up with this and why that person is not running the country. 2. Key in the first three digits of your phone number (NOT the area code) 3. Multiply by 80 4. Add 1 5. Multiply by 250 6. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number 7. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number again. 8. Subtract 250 9. Divide number by 2 Do you recognize the ANSWER?

Show our readers what you’ve got!

Bob at Bob’s Grocery (off 21st and Post office) admits that he reads the Galveston Wizard. We even gave him a “www.galvestonwizard.com” tshirt for his enthusiasm about it! Thanks for being open late and for letting us put issues there for our readers!

1. Grab a calculator. (you won’t be able to do this one in your head)

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G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

Catch Shark Attack at Gravity Bar? Be sure to catch them next time!

Life would be harder without G R AV I T Y
Gravity Bar, that is. (2120 Strand) has been good to us. Long time advertisers and just downright good friends! No matter what night you check in to one of Galveston’s coolest bars, you can be sure of a good time! A growing and diverse music forum, unique acts, cold beer, great mixed drinks, and a few of the best bartenders around, it’s no wonder so many people can’t resist checking it out. Gravity does indeed make the world go round. Tell them the Galveston Wizard guided you there! Meet people, have fun. Live a little. Check out more information at myspace.com/gravitybar or call them at 762.4004.

Gravity Bar
www.myspace.com/gravitybar

Friday is...

International HAPPY Night!* HOUR
M-TH 4 to 8
FRI 4 to 10

2120 Strand Galvatraz, Texas
*Free Salsa Lessons from 8:30 til 10

Sunday enjoy

Saturday get...

LIVE MUSIC!

One-Man Band Blues & Open Mic

Because a Cab Fare
Is Cheaper than a

Gravity makes the world go round.

New Reggae Band in Town
is looking for musicians of all kinds, most importantly drummers, and DJs. Reggae experience is a plus!
My name is Dru I’m the singer/songwriter/percussionist (281)300-3523 Stuart plays the bass/keyboards (281)513-1301 www.myspace.com/soulfirereggae Any musician interested regardless of what instrument they play should give us a call!

D.U.I.
Tropical Taxi
Clean, Full-Sized Cars and 7 Passenger Vans!

Thanx, Dru P.S. check out my new tracks www.myspace.com/soulfirereggae

409.621.4000

24-hour service on or off the Island!

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G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

Night out on the Town
(or, “Seeking where it’s at.”)
Two Phase I Press Passes and a stack of the latest G’Wiz were all we had on us besides a wad of cash and a few other “Press” accessories. (Camera, Pens, Business Cards, Keys, Smokes, Lighter, Flier, Phone, More!) Mixed Tape Reef activity at Yaga’s Cafe? We’re there! It was a thrill ride, negotiating our way into the V.I.P. area, enjoying complimentary keg beer, and meeting key organizers for the event! We’d love to be involved in promoting happenings on the island! Imagine everything bigger! Let us help!

July 28th

Lights for Camp Janus Burn Camp Over Roswell Benefit
Cost is $12 at the door; $7 Presale
Starts at 8:00 pm, All ages Welcome Galveston Municipal Airport
www.myspace.com/lightsoverroswell

B bW Bob Wagner Productions presents P

Who is Versatile?
You may not know, yet. If you paid attention just shy of a year ago, and you were able to focus in on one visionary and his quest to follow his dreams to success in the music industry, you might have seen Kervin Griffin. Making things happen with his music. Seeking other musicians to get excited and ready For Booking, CD, Team-Ups, or Ideas or Shout Outs, about the possibility that call Kervin Directly at 409.939.7225 success is just around the corner! To put out his viewpoints, ideologies, warnings, and relational experiences out there is not easy, and if you find it difficult to handle the reality of the experiences, hardships, look with him to the upcoming triumphs that lie ahead. Nothing can stop him now. Why not support his efforts?

“Do something this Saturday, would’ja?!”

J July 28th

PaypaChasing Poetry presents

WordPoetry Slam War II
Cost is $10 at the door; $6 Presale
$500 Winner Take All. All Poets welcome to compete or perform.

Doors open @ 7, show starts at 7:30
For more information call 713.585.1089
www.myspace.com/godonbeats
I’m sure that none of us would ever commit any of these traffic offenses, but if you do and you get caught, the fines are increasing significantly, but at least you have been warned. Starting July 1, 2007 1. Carpool lane - 1st time $1068.50 starting 7/1/07 (The $271 posted on the highway is old). Don’t do it again because 2nd time is going to be double. 3rd time triple, and 4th time license suspended. 2. Incorrect lane change - $380. Don’t cross the lane on solid lines or intersections. 3. Block intersection - $485 4. Driving on the shoulder - $450 5. Cell phone use in the construction zone. - Double fine as of 07/01/07.

Cell phone use must be “hands free” while driving. 6. Passengers over 18 not in their seat belts - both passengers and drivers get tickets . 7. Speeders can only drive 3 miles above the limit. 8. DUI = JAIL (Stays on your driving record for 10 years!)

9. As of 07/01/07 cell phone use must be “hands free” while driving. Ticket is $285. They will be looking for this like crazy - easy money for police department. PASS THIS ON TO SOMEONE YOU CARE ABOUT..... We DID! Send us important info your fellow man would do well with knowing!

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G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

Maybe it’s time to

TAKE a vacation

(cause you know nobody’s going to give you one!)

You’ve been burning the candle at both ends. But your world needs you! Keep the axe at the grind, and keep it up! Every day and in a hundred million ways, you are making a difference in other people’s lives, hopefully for the better. We often find ourselves unable to imagine what would happen if we went away. Would the world still turn? Would the sun rise tomorrow if you were at the beach instead of the office for once! Have you earned vacation time where you work? (If you don’t work, finding work will feel like a vacation to where you might be right now.) Do you get vacation time where you work? Where would you go? What would you do? Something like a cruise? (Back Cover) Or what about a cool getaway spot? (See Below) It’s all up to you!

Don’t forget to bring us back cool ideas and pictures!
email them to us at

[email protected]

Visit www.galvestonwizard.com for more info

V Visit www.galvestonwizard.com for more info o
(imagine your business here!)

Visit www.galvestonwizard.com for more info

SUPPORT OUR ADVERTISERS
(they make sh*t happen!)

V Visit www.galvestonwizard.com for more info o

Rent a new Jamaica Beach canal home with boat lift for less than you think. Sleeps 6. Lower your boat, 10 minutes to West Bay fishing. 150 yards to boat ramp. 2 bedroom, 2 bath, well furnished, 300+ channel cable tv. Available for corporate, long-term, and weekend rental. STAR Tournament marina 6 miles by water (sports bar: stumbling distance). [email protected]

We first saw this and thought that it was ridiculous. Then we found out that labeling everything helps your kid with spelling, relation, and retention! Why not also write it in espanol as well?

ARE YOU A HOME BASED BUSINESS OWNER OR CONTRACTOR?

Looking to make the phone ring?
I CAN BRING NEW CUSTOMERS FOR CHEAP. FOR REAL.

PRETTY INGENIUS!

Call Meredith 281-638-2672

The entire staff was unable to solve the difficult puzzle from T.F. Hippies.... until Mingo sat down and solved it! Yay! You are one smart Son’ov’a....!

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G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

Word of mouth leads us to GBE Automotive
We just figured out how similar the world of publishing is to that of a full service automotive shop. There’s a million things going on, you gotta get specific parts from all of these different places, and then you have to have a skilled team to implement and complete the job. A trustworthy source said that they had gotten good service at GBE Automotive Center on 35th and Broadway, and that fateful day when we were driving down 53rd street and our horn went haywire, we recalled that recommendation and decided to investigate further. Wiring was faulty, and the horn on our car shorted, causing the horn on the car to blow like we were kung fu palming the horn over and over again. Try it sometime to get an idea of our overall quietneigborhood popularity levels and looks...it wasn’t good. That paired with the fact that every fifth attempt to start the car yeilded no response from the suddenly exhausted vehicle. (?!) The skilled team at GBE, spearheaded by Sonny, George, Mike, Ray and other “behind the scene” horn masters of all things auto, made sure we were kept up to date as to the progress of our primary mode of transportation. Electrical, and hornical. They got us back on the road in no time! And what do we do while we are waiting for one part of our periodical to come in? We begin working on the next! We were thrown headlong into the world of the pedestrian or bikestrian. We have resolved to do an in-depth look at the island’s various transit systems, along with other options like cabs, carpooling, motorized carts, bikes, and even your own two feet! The island is relatively small! It’s only far because you are thinking in “car.” Several walks from our homes lead us to the beach. Talk about island time! We’ve got to figure out how to get forward thinking Galvestonians where they need to be... Faster. Got ideas? Let us hear them! email thewiz@ galvestonwizard.com

The GBE Team is here to help!
Bring this page in for a special discount!
“Discount on what?” You ask? Well, what are you looking for? GBE is a one-stop shop for every car or truck out there. Looking to customize your pickup or S.U.V? No problem. They also offer A.C. Repair, Tune-Ups, Brake Problems, Diesel high performance work. Truck Accessories, Parts, More! Thanks again GBE Automotive for fixing our wiring and our horn! If your car’s running good, honk as you pass by. If it’s not running good, pull her on in and let them take a look!

GBE AUTOMOTIVE
3502 Broadway • (409) 762-7551
Open: M-F 8:00-5:30 Sat 8:00-1:00 Closed Sunday

“FollowtheLight”

(back issues, more!)

www.galvestonwizard.com l i d

When moving, Be sure to plan well in advance! Alleviate stress when you plan for success! Moving sucks. It will cost more than you think!

Thanks for the support!

RICK BACON GETS AN AD!

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G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

Hooters
We checked out
on the day it opened. The eight of us enjoyed a huge porch table and we watched the place get ultra-packed in no time flat! Good friends, good food, cold beer...what a treat. The ladies were happy to pose for Galveston Wizard readers! We appreciate your being here on the island! The more cool places we get on the island, the more we know the island is growing! Let the Galveston Wizard bring it’s readers to you!

Getting ready...

Ed ponders dessert.
“cheeeeessse!”

Explore exciting new things in your realm!

Which Hooters Girl was yours on opening day?

Discover

Lesli Gallery
Open

10
T

Nestled between Cocktails Karaoke and Piano Bar and T.F.Hippie’s Toy store on Mechanic Street, Leslie Gallery offers a fine selection of work from fine local artists! Celia Strain will be happy to answer any questions you may have! 2413 Mechanic Street Stop by and say hellp!

Located At

Galveston 7755 50 409.763.6370

Preserve and Display
Diploma G’Wiz Article Collectible Posters Memorabelia Significant Certificates

Why not?

Art & Custom Framing is Our Business.

Customer Service is Our Pleasure!
Thanks Galveston for voting us “Best Gallery” Two years in a row!

More....!

Show your appreciation for the support of others! Charlie DiBella looks over a framed copy of the first issue, along with an article from the same issue touting his prominence, along with two friends, as to their “Rat Pack” like celebrity. Local Icons!Check out the write up for yourself at His restaurant, DiBella’s, on 31st and Ave P. “Just come on down Ave P until you see us there on 31st. Come hungry! Leave Happy!

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G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

Can’t get to the store? check them out online at www.tfhippies.com

Texas Hold-Em At Cocktails

“I’m All in. ”

Remember! No More Left turns on 23rd and Broadway! Hey, anyone need house cleaning? Call 409.256.9052 and tell them the Galveston Wizard sent you.

Hey, happening bars and clubs! Why glue your money to the ground when you can have it working for you! Let us promote “where it’s at” to bring you more money and customers! They might not know! About what? Exactly! We can help you tell them!

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G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

Weeeeeee! Promoting your business can be fun too!
Putting your business out there in front of readers is what we’re after!
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T-Shirts (we call them “Walking Billboards” pg 7)

Marketing/Promotions
Outdoor (See our Stand Adoption Agency, pg11) Business Facelift (menu’s, brochures, more?)

Branding (Who are you again?) Event team up and coordination (Be where it’s at) Networking (see quote at left) Online Presence (with powerful Galveston.com)
First you’ve gotta get that ball rolling. Hey, why not ...

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Terms: All advertising is invoiced at beginning of contract. All invoices are due and payable upon receipt. If payment not received one week prior to publication, space may be lost. Checks should be made payable to G'Wiz Enterprises. All mail to: P.O. Box 3467, Galveston, TX 77552. Advertisers agree to all terms described in the G'Wiz Rate Sheet. All ad materials are subject to approval at the sole discretion of G'Wiz Enterprises. Advertisers and advertising agencies assume liability for all content of advertisements and also assume responsibilities for any claims arising therefrom against the publisher. Ad rates subject to change. Publisher will notify contract advertisers in writing 30 days prior to rate change, at which time the advertiser may either accept the new rate for remainder of contract term of cancel without short-term penalty.

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26 End of Ages

G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

Ah, Rome ~M. Phillips
I

enjoyed an era of peace and prosperity that lasted 200 years. Maybe an Emperor is what we need. I can’t help wondering what Cleo was like in the sheets, to get so deep in a man’s head that he goes toe to toe with often hear (and when I say often, I mean one time I had this dream and Caesar. Anyway, where was I? Yes, the parallels. Are there any, really? I mean, it’s not like it seemed real as hell) that there are a disturbing number of parallels between the United States and the Roman Empire. Disturbing because, we’ve ever taken an armada to distant shores, subdued the natives other than a steadily diminishing Mafia presence and a small contingent of and brought them back as slaves. We wouldn’t dream of establishing oily young men on Vespa scooters, all signs of Roman prominence have preeminent military might and imposing our ideology on weaker nations. gone to ruin. Vatican City doesn’t count. They historically move that And never would we leave legions of armed men in a sovereign state once it was abundantly clear the locals place wherever the Pope fancies. wanted us gone. All these things Anyway, I awoke thinking, there are distinctly, historically Roman. but for the grace of God go we – I, for one, say the bastards ought to the once great Americans, no more be ashamed. There’s also the blight than a chapter in a history book. A of infighting that defined so much short one. of Roman history. How ridiculous Yet, that whole premise is to compare our greatness with a flawed. An empire has an Emperor: people who couldn’t even manage a guy who can, for example, take to avert civil war. an entire nation to war without the True, there are little things consent of a democratic governing that make us look, at a glance, body and tax the bejesus out of his vaguely similar (to the republic, people to pay for it. An Emperor not the empire). The Romans might do something like submit his had a Senate, comprised of rich reign to the whimsy of a popular and politically connected people. vote, then, when it didn’t go his We’ve got one of those, and we way, summarily nullify that shit. still let poor people vote just like No, what we have is much better: a they did. They pioneered modern republic. And so had the Romans, plumbing. We like plumbing. They once upon a time. A glorious utopian “Romericans.” Illustrated by Hoy Polloi built an extensive system of roads. republic with indoor crappers. Harrumph. Then a powerful Roman military commander named Marcus We really dig documentaries about those roads. Roman numerals easily Antonius went to Egypt on holiday and hooked up with Queen Cleopatra confuse us, but we don’t give up, especially when it comes to names and VII over at the Pyramid Club. Jump ahead several blissfully exhausting world wars. Rome kept the Balkan Peninsula in check, and I can’t imagine months and, blinded by his lover’s charm, Marcus up and went off at none we would take no heap of shit from them folks neither. Sometimes, on other than Caesar Em Effin Augustus. As blunders go – man, it would our important government buildings, we’ll put a “v” in some word where suck to be Marcus at that point. there’s supposed to be a “u”. Got that from them. And finally, their There were some Greeks in there somewhere. Feta, philosophy, republican period lasted from five centuries before Christ, nearly until and goat on a stick. But that’s pretty much where the pertinent history they killed him. We killed David Koresh in 1993. He was from Houston. lesson ends. For, after he trounced Marcus and Cleo and her whole damn Jim Jones was born in Crete (Indiana), but Powers Boothe, who played country, Caesar went all Divi filius on ‘em (literally, “son of a god”) and him in the movie, hails from right over here in Snyder, Texas. Wow. did away with any pretense of a republic back home. Rome thereafter Small world.

“Send a simple sign I can understand, then a flower grew out that sand, before you know it, I was back out on that sea.” If you don’t own Gnarles Barkley’s St.Elsewhere album, then you just don’t know.... But you can learn.

Filthy McNasty and Jan Pose for a pic

“hello?”

Advertising works! Put yourself in front of our readers and they will be able to find you!

27 End of Ages

G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

Quest to Bolivar
The Galveston Wizard, in it’s Quest to Be everywhere that cool people are (Whew! You people are everywhere!), decided that it was time to make the trip to the Bolivar Peninsula. A peninsula is a piece of land surrounded on three sides by water. That’s almost like an island! Our voyages have taken us far into the western realms of Galveston! And we’re loving what we see! Someday soon we will be in full force there, and we appreciate the hospitality. Cool People Like Nobert at the bait camp at Ferry Lnading were excited about checking out the issue! “Oh, great! Sure! Leave a stack and I’ll give them to people as the leave!” Wow! Sure are nice. Great smelling restaurants and tasty looking beverages warmed and cooled hands of first-time readers. At one bar, a whole rail of customers were seemingly turning the pages of their first issues in unison. The transition from them reading to themselves to discussions with peers on memories jarred or stories read with newfound friends took little time at all to begin. Ahhh....it’s what we live for! We look forward to returning to this land. There is much to explore, and the people there are ready.

“Because We Had Never Done It Before.”

Windy day and a cool view from the ferry deck.

Ferry job inquiries? call 795-2230 The open road! Make sure you got enough gas in the tank

From which bar can one find this view? < tiny view hint at left!

What unique dining and shopping opportunities are available to you? We are excited to find them! We put out issues at several of what we thought were hotspots. The seeds are sown!

Golf Carts ` Fulbio
409.744.4296

Electric

They say you must learn one executive sport...golf or tennis. With those pasty legs of yours, why not consider golf? (where pants are more common..., don’t get us wrong, though, we love tennis too!) The Municipal Golf Course is under renovation, so where does one go to practice? See coupon at Right. Check out Rancho Carribe’ in Bolivar when you’re ready to take on the links! Their number is 409.684.1600! Also, check out the Cool Golf Carts at left! For sale! Sure beats filling the gas tank...more on electric vehicles next issue!

Bring this coupon to the

Island Driving Range

OF BALLS
For the price of a medium!
(or a medium bucket for a small if you like your current handicap)

Large Bucket

GET A

Located at 9020 Stewart Road (409)741-1357 (Near the back entrance to Premiere Cinema!)

28 End of Ages

G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

Let Brett with BRF Bikes take your radical customisations, upgrades and other bike work to the next level. Call him at 281.381.3388 for more information. Restore a vintage to a custom classic.

29 End of Ages

G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

Stew challenges EVERYONE to join him in cleaning up this town!

I have lived in Galveston officially for only about two months now, though I’ve lived in the Galveston area for five years total off and on. I lived outside of Texas for the past fourteen months and, I must admit, there was a certain ‘sweetness’ about returning to the state where my parents raised me. We used to vacation in the beautiful mud we call ocean here.

a second bridge as well! The gardens now have three pyramids and a huge hotel to loom behind it. But most impressive: a Target (what can I say, I’m a fan). Then we turned onto 61st and sadly little has changed there. I see them pushing some dirt around with bulldozers but they seem to care so little about the small mountains of trash that have settled all along the rocks, spilling into the water. I say ‘seem’, because if they cared at all they would take the time to pick that shit up. Yeah. I said it. SHIT. That’s exactly what it is.

their way to the seawall, and to Schlitterbahn and to Moody Gardens. If I were just visiting 61st for the first time I would think I was supposed to discard my trash there.

So I’m gonna complain. LOUDLY. I’m gonna write this story. And, hopefully, inspire you–NO piss you off! You who is reading this. But I’m going to go a step further. I’m going to make a It was May to be exact when my mom picked pledge. I pledge that on Saturday July 28, 2007 me up at the airport to return me to Galveston. at 7 A.M. I’m going to take my ass down there This was the first time in a long time that I had and pick that shit up myself, come and help me been reunited with, literally, hundreds of my if you want. Or don’t. But keep an eye out when childhood memories. I was amazed as we rode your driving past later that day. On July 7 we will the causeway to see how much has changed So me and my mom sandwiched between all find out if I’ve kept my pledge or not. It will be in so little time. A water park, not only open but vacationers. No not like that you pervert. My a surprise to me as well if I can drag myself out of entering into phase two of it’s water life. We were mom and I in our vehicle sandwiched between bed on the butt-crack of dawn on a Saturday, but riding over a brand new bridge and I could see two other vacationer filled vehicles. Some who I can honestly say that I believe I will. Will you? that they were most of the way through building are getting this first impression of Galveston on

(Tile flooring. Looks awesome!)

Avoid the appearance of evil.

Wiz Kids relaxing off of Seawall.

You can find beauty and art in almost anything! Be Aware.

MISCHIEF.

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G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

Ask Arlessa!

Hey there! This is my introduction to you, my fellow Galvestonians here on the Island as….Arrr! My more difficult but actual name is Arlessa. The Arrr is derived from Arrrlessa, like a pirate…Arrr! (This leads into a very long story I am not going to go into, so I’m sticking to the basics). I’m new to the Wizard, testing the waters with the knowledge I keep locked away in my advice “lock box”. I’m hoping that through this advice column, that I’m putting my faith into will reach out to you and help give an opinion worth something to someone who might need it. Feel free to drop me a line or 2, or 3…etc… reveal and ask about your deepest darkest secrets…ok, it’s not that intense of a column…remember, the Wizard is a public paper, so we would love for you to keep it PG-13 & under. I’m sure there will be those few who just can’t resist the tempting act of sending in quite random and crazy questions. With those people already in thought, I am looking forward to the real questions from you. It’s nice to meet yall and always remember, if all else fails….Ask Arrrr(lessa)!

Arlessa!

Q

: I just moved to Galveston from Wisconsin to be with my boyfriend. He works a lot and has his group friends. I want my own group of friends and go out and meet new people. I need to do something with my time!! What kind of places are good to get my mingle on? Sincerely, “Need a Social Life”

: First, Welcome to Galveston! We love that you are making it your home! Ok, good thing about Galveston is that it’s a very social place. I always refer to Galveston as “The place where people come and go”. You have so many different types of people who come to this Island, so you’re always meeting new people wherever you go. As for places to meet these people are The Poop Deck (of course, I work there) Molly’s, Busker’s, Murphy’s, Lucky lounge….these are more local hang outs for the 21 and up crowd. Also, keep updated with The Wizard. We are a Galveston Island based newspaper. We’ll keep you hooked into the Galveston scene. Good Luck Chicky! Arlessa

A

Phase 2 of our Web site...
is going to be an interactive, ultra-useful resource to those who find themselves away from an issue and in front of a computer! Got ideas that would make the next phase more useful to you? Send us an email from our site at www.galvesotnwizard.com
We recently got a text message that said that “Circuit City is giving away $200 gift cards to the 1st 2,000 callers to 1-800429-4897.” The duped caller was directed to a Gay Hotline! Check out www.snopes.com for what rumors or statistics are legit!

Want to send Arlessa a question? Show your support and send her a question! She’s here to help! Email her at

Isn’t that sweet? Flies get wasted away in left out margaritaville. You think this was bad, you should see what an untended mimosa looks like! Extra protien! Yum!

“do I look cooler yet?”
Promote yourself! Others need your help! First they need to know who you are!

Keep drinkin, buddy!

31 End of Ages

G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

Standing Room Only at Prudential Branch Grand Opening!
Our good friend and and supporter Jan McGovern (see her color panel ad, page 17) gave us the scoop. There would be a grand opening of a new Prudential, Gary Green Realtors at 823 Broadway. (That’s on the right side as you’re headed to the smaller numbers on Broadway). The function was scheduled to begin at 5:00, with a ribbon cutting from the Chamber of Commerce to be followed by food, spirits, and business card and idea swapping and business trend analyzing! Opening still going on? Yes. And there’s still a full bar. That was all we needed to hear. We slammed the phone down, grabbed our camera and keys, ran outside, slid across the hood of the car, jumped in, and we were on our way! The minglings were good, and so was the food! Grey Goose and Cranberry in one hand, business cards in another, it was time to do some promoting! Of what? Of them, of course! We’re here to help! Congratulations on the new branch, Prudential, and here’s to your continued success! Contact us at thewiz@ galvestonwizard.com and let us know how we may be of service! Or call us directly at 409.621.2864

We were running a little behind, stopping at Chalmers to buy supplies to upgrade our darkroom for more streamlined t-shirt production. (see our self ad on page 7!) We called Jan at 5:45 pm. Is the Grand Never miss an opportunity to meet interesting and new people. Super friendly realtors and loan specialists want to know how they can help you find the perfect home you have been looking for!

(Above left) Jan McGovern, Carolyn Gaido, Edie Harrington, Alice Melott, Suzanne McClure, and Andrea Sunseri pose! (Above Right) Tracy and Tony relaxing and talking shop. Everyone was so nice!

Local Musician Sees The Writing on the Wall
For over a year now, the place to be Texas”). “I moved here on purpose” on Galveston Monday night is Poor he notes, “This is where the music Michael’s on the Strand, where Billy I love is being made and played, Bourbon hosts his weekly musical and I wanted to be a part of it.” His excursion. single, “Quick As I Could” (currently #9 and rising on the TexasTop40. “The question I get asked most com) is about his dream and search often by people who’ve never for the Texas Lifestyle. heard us is, ‘what kind of music do you play?’ I keep trying to come up “I met my wife here, she’s a Houston with a description” Billy Bourbon native, and she’s my biggest music smiles sheepishly. “My latest name fan. I named an instrumental after for it is ‘Texas Gumbo Music’ - Red her, “Flutterbuttin’”. Once the music Dirt country, rock and blues with a starts my baby has a hard time rue of humor.” sittin’ still. Humor is a big part of Billy’s music, with songs like “Bongo Dry”, “Women, Whiskey, and Weed”, and the infamous “Vasoline”. Live, he often covers songs from Jason Boland (“Nymphomaniac”), Charlie Robison (“Bar Light, Bar Bright”) and Guy Clarke (“Home Grown Tomatoes”). Born in Missouri, Billy moved to Galveston Texas from Nebraska (which he often refers to as “North “Poor Michael has been a great supporter. He has live music seven days a week” says Billy. “He’s hard on musicians - he likes bands to play quiet, and he will fire ‘em right on the spot. As he says it’s his name on the sign out front. He’ll make you stop in the middle of a song to drink a shot with him. On the other hand he has let me play whatever I want and do my show as I please Monday nights, and now we’re adding Wednesday nights.” We’ve got some new things on the horizon as well, including a podcast of Monday’s shows. Podcasting is basically internet broadcasting, with thousands of people creating their own shows, and millions more tuning them in. “I’m really excited about it”, says Billy, “Galveston is a world port, and people from all over have seen us play. Lot’s of Swedes and Scandinavians, Brits, Aussies, and Japanese. Almost all of them have the internet, and it’s possible this little band from Texas could go world-wide!” “Texas Music is a big in lots of the good-ole-USA too” adds Billy, “People are just drawn to it like I was.” Come be part of their live shows Monday and Wednesday nights, at Poor Michael’s on the Strand, corner of 20th & Strand, Galveston, TX, U.S., Earth.

32 End of Ages

G’Wiz: Galveston Wizard

Plan the Perfect Getaway!

Explore Your Options Today!
(The world is at your fingertips)

Next Issue:
Galveston Film Festival (GFF) talks begin Vince? Lynn? Joey? Tim? You? “Social Loafing, and how we can change it.”

by Vince “Self destruction has got me again.” by Dirty Lopez Meeting with Dash Eerily Interesting! Matteu Bares Soul.
photo of the beach at dawn photo of the seawall at dawn
You got better ideas? Let us know! Send us an email!

Freelance Photographer in Galveston, TX ARE YOUPrince-De’Vshon Day (409) 354-3402 8100 SeawallPICTORAL QUEST? READY TO SEND IN YOUR FIRST Blvd. # 339

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