Payday

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Charlie Fitzmaurice Payday The sun was sinking towards the edge of the sky in a fashion that made it appear to be balancing on the western horizon. From its position in the October sky, the bright orb emitted rays of dull, brown-orange light into the windows of Yenslev and Arkardy’s financial consultants’ office in central Moscow, Russia. On the second floor, two coworkers were preparing to leave the office after a full day at work. They were the last ones left at their cubicles. The dull light shone onto a clock on the wall opposite the window looking out onto the Moscow skyline. The clock read 5:00 in the afternoon, October 17th, 1994. “Well, what do you think, Ivan?” asked Yuri Tenechev, the more heavyset of the two co-workers. He was a roundfaced man with dark chestnut hair and and a roman nose. “Sorry?” Ivan Bestrisky replied quizzically. He was the older of the two men and had thin black hair that was beginning to turn gray on both sides. “I said, `what do you think about it all?’” Yuri asked again. “You do have an opinion don’t you?” “Life is cruel, hard, and complicated,” replied Ivan. “Everybody dies alone.” Yuri, pulling his autumn coat around his shoulders, replied “I meant something more on the lines of what you think about Boris becoming the new project manager, as well as our righteous new boss.” “What do I think about the company replacing old Markov with Boris Ustroskythe only person in world who can’t see that this firm won’t last another two months

before going bankrupt? I think that it’s a wonderful decision and I’m glad that when the corporation does finally go under, it will all explode in one fateful day like a red dwarf. Hopefully, we’ll have clients demanding their money and possibly a riot outside of the office. Better to go out in a bang than in a slow, respectable, responsible fashion of admitting that the end is near and saving time and energy for everyone involved. Nope, better to go down like the Pequod under the weight of a giant white wale.” “Glad to see that you’re in fine spirits today Ivan,” Yuri said as a smile spread across his face. “Say, here comes Captain Ahab himself.” Boris Ustroski, a thin young man with funky horn rimmed glasses, walked briskly into the room. “Good afternoon gentlemen,” he said in his usual brash, cocky tone “how does my plan to put the company back on its feet seem to be working out?” “Oh, well good afternoon Captain Boris,” replied Ivan in an overly respectful tone. “It seems as though your new system of client assurance documentation is purely genius. We should be able to get all of our filing done just in time for all of the documents to be shredded when the firm declares bankruptcy. As they say in America, we are A-okay and ready to roll! Come on Yuri, let’s get out of here.” “Hold on Ivan, I want you to stick around for a moment,” Boris said as Ivan and Yuri headed towards the door. “It won’t take long” Yuri gave Ivan two thumbs up and a wild smile. “Good Times,” he murmured as he walked out the door and descended down the stairs to the building’s lobby below. On the second floor, Boris, sliding into the chair that Yuri had been occupying, addressed Ivan.

“Well Ivan, you’ve made it a long way. It’s not often that a sociopathic junkie like yourself is able to stay in the financial consulting business for long, especially one with a record like yours. A record containing two arrests for suspected heroin possession does not look too good to an employer” “I do what I can,” Ivan replied nonchalantly. “Oh, you do everything that you can. Making friends Arkardy and Yenslev turns out to be pretty useful seeing as they prevent me from cutting you loose. But don’t you dare think for one second think that I won’t throw your ass out on the street if I find one reason to,” Boris said Impatiently. His swagger had evaporated and he was beginning to give in to frustration “You really don’t get it, do you?” asked Ivan, getting up from the chair and pulling his thick fur hat over his ears. “We’re all going to get our asses thrown out on the street and possibly thrown in prison too. Seriously, how much money do you think your superiors haven’t stolen from their clients since this firm started up? Even you can’t save this ship from sinking. Not after Yenslev and Arkardy have been sailing it upside down for the last several years. Hell Boris, you’re trying to sail a capsized boat!” With this statement Ivan left Boris sitting in the office, stunned, with his mouth open. The project supervisor’s day had ended in a fashion so unexpectedly confrontational that for the first time in his life, he was truly dumbfounded. Ivan met up with Yuri in the parking lot as the sun was sinking below its point of balance over the forests to the west. About half of the golden orb was visible as the two men met in the company lot behind the office.

“What was all that about?” Yuri asked as the two of them walked towards Ivan’s car. “The usual B.S.,” replied Ivan, “are you still riding with me?” “Yeah man, my car’s been impounded,” Yuri said as the two men climbed into Ivan’s small, rusty, Fiat Panda. “I’ve received more parking tickets in the last couple of months than you count on two hands.” As Ivan and Yuri were about to pull away, a young woman approached the car and rapped her hand on the driver’s side window. She was Maria Tenovski, one of the firm’s brightest young project managers. As Ivan slowly rolled down the driver’s seat window, she spoke in an excited voice. “Hey Ivan! Hey Ivan! You really got under Boris’ skin today my friend,” she said, panting as though she had run to catch the car before it left the parking lot. “I just talked to him and he said that he’s considering firing you.” “Oh don’t worry about me Maria” replied Ivan, “if they fire me, who in the world are they going to blame for the uh,” Ivan paused for dramatic effect. “The whole Ponzi scheme thing on when the clients want their money back” “Well Ivan you certainly are one for conspiracy theories. If half of what you say about the firm is true, somebody would have gone to the police. “Well, the time for doing that has long since come and gone,” said Ivan “I’m afraid that we’re all going to be dragged into a an enormous charade of…” “Enough Ivan,” interrupted Yuri “Have a good evening Maria, we’ve got to roll” Ivan complied, saying goodbye to Mariah and rolling the car out of the parking lot into the busy Moscow rush hour traffic.

“So, Boris threatened to fire you?” inquired as the two drove towards the suburbs. “Yeah, apparently I’m a bad influence on the rest of you guys. You’d better watch out Yuri, soon enough you shall be corrupted by my evil ways. You will be a mindless drone subject to my bidding, buying me drugs and all kinds of stuff.” They both smiled at this remark. “Well, I am wondering how you have masterfully uncovered this Ponzi scheme while the rust of us have not.” “Back in the office, Boris wondered how a ‘sociopathic junkie’ such as myself could last this long in financial consulting.” Ivan recalled. “Well, lets just say that I’ve found out some things during my tenure at the firm that would make the Administration think twice about firing me. Things that our clients would very much like to know. Things like where there money has been going.” By this time, the car was stuck in a traffic jam on Bolshoy Krashokholmsky Bridge. The Dire Straits song “Walk of Life”, a number one hit during the 80’s, was playing on the radio. “Yep, that’s me. A sociopathic junkie,” said Ivan. “It’s quite a description. Do you think I should put it on my résumé for my next job? I might as well. Who would want to hire the crooks from Yenslev and Arkardy’s anyway.” “I thought you said that we were all going to jail,” Yuri said. “Let me tell you, I sure wouldn’t want to do time in some of the prisons around here.” “Well, you won’t have to worry about it if we get killed by the angry mob that will probably form outside of the office to demand their money. One thing I’ve learned

over the years is never to get between a fat rich guy from Moscow and his money,” said Ivan. As the mass of traffic slowly crawled over the bridge, a small sliver of the sun was just barely visible over the treelike in the far west. It looked like the bow of a ship, just barely visible above the waves that were pulling it deeper and deeper into the depths. As Ivan’s car approached the center of the bridge, the two men could plainly see the cause of the jam. A suicide jumper was standing on the edge of the bridge and a large crowd of people had left their cars to watch. Ivan and Yuri got out of the Fiat, as the traffic on the bridge was completely stationary. “Gee”, said Ivan, if these people wanted to see violence so much, they should have joined us in Afghanistan. We might as well join him though, as it seems that we will soon end up incarcerated, unemployed or dead. “Better to just push him off the edge,” said Yuri that way we can all get home at a reasonable hour. My wife and I have plans.” “You know what? I think I’m going to do that” said Ivan as he started towards the police barrier between the crowd and the jumper. “Let’s make a bet on the charge on which I will be arrested” “I say conspiracy to attempt assisting suicide, it sounds just ridiculous enough for the Moscow police.” “More like saving public time and energy,” Ivan called back as he made his way through the crowd. When he reached the police circle around the jumper, he broke through the barrier, ran towards the jumper and began to converse with him. “Hello, my name is Ivan Bestrisky.

“Are you a cop? I cannot be saved. I’m jumping” “No, I’m a sociopathic junkie who wants you to jump already so that I can drive home.” Meanwhile, one of the police officers began to converse with Yuri. “So, who is your friend there?” asked the cop “Is he a negotiator or something?” No, but he’s more than ample for this situation. He’s ex-military, served in Afghanistan in the 80’s and returned to Moscow a heroin addict. His wife and family left him. Everything that he has ever fought for has crumbled underneath him. He knows more about the world than I ever want to. All of a sudden, after having been engaged with the suicide jumper for several minutes, Ivan kicked the man in the gut, knocking him backwards. His arms flailing, the suicide jumper fell 50 feet onto a police on the Moscow Riverbarge covered with a large, inflated emergency pad. As the police handcuffed him, Ivan called out to the crowd. “Ladies and Gentlemen, that brings us to the end of the show. I hope it satisfied your need for action. I hope it made your day.” He then called to his friend “Hey Yuri, don’t bother bailing me out of jail, I’m bound to end up in the pen anyway and I’d rather go out this way than to get put away for investor fraud.” As the police pushed Ivan into the squad car, the sun completely disappeared in the western sky. The rays that still illuminated half of the dusk sky would eventually disappear, shrouding the world in darkness. It was 6:00 in the evening.

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