Robert

CHAPTER 1: THE MAN
Darkness.
That is all there ever was. Darkness.
From the day we are born until the day we die, darkness is what welcomes us.
Looking past this structure, among the windows lie the darkest cell.
Upon which there lies a man, asleep in his bed. Alone and Cold.
The man wakes up, sitting abruptly. He looks around the place.
Everything is the same.
He lifts and hugs his knees, looking so much a lost boy than a grown man. Rugged and curly haired, eyes
of bloodshot red, swollen lips, and pale skin, this man looks upon the smallest of the windows in his cell
and gazes upon the outside for a while. There was really nothing much you could ever do in his situation
except lie and contemplate about the reasons why he is here.
He looks upon the stars and smiles.
The smile that says, How are things going out there?
Slow and heavy tears form and falls from that man’s eyes. And still he looks upon everything with that
simple smile. He looks upon the guarded walls, towering high above seemingly to the sky. Guard posts
shining lights upon the grassy ground searching for any miscreants on the prowl.
But beyond that he sees the wonder of the world he could have been in. The world where he could have
finished college; a world that could have offered him a stable job to support him and his sister.
A frown and a couple more tears fall down his face. The truest of tears fall. He almost collapses in his
bunk. Sister, he thinks. I have a sister.
He lets his guard down and cries for a long, long while.
Everything is for her.
He sniffs and wipes the snot in his nose with the rugged stripped clothes he wore for days. He sniffs and
puffs out a heavy breath.
It is worth it.
He knows. Only he knows. And yet, that is the reason why he is in this place, because only he, knows.
He stands up and paces the stone cold floor. Back and forth. Back and forth. He leans in the bars that
separate his life from the outside. He listens to the varying degrees of snores around him.
Bob is asleep again. That crazy b*stard. The man chuckles to himself.

Bob is the guard in duty. And his snores resonate along with the couple more men around him. Snore
symphony he chuckled. To this man, this may be the last symphony he could ever hear.
He leans in further through the gaps in between the bars and mutters, a word so low, only if you lean in
closely could you understand what he said.
Goodbye.
He smiles sadly. Tears again threaten to spill his eyes. He might have been in this place for years but these
people have been his family. They were there. They had no choice. They had to be there; To see and look
at what will become of him.
He stands alone and gazes at his cell. The room he grew accustomed to. He remembers the fantasies he
used to conjure during the first few weeks he had been here, a room with this great water bed which
bounces as much as your buttocks did whenever he sits on it; a room with a desk and a computer where
he could gaze through the world with a few flicks of a finger through the ‘net; a room. A room for me.
Yet years passed by. the room grew into cobwebbed walls, cold and hard floors, and a cold, hard bed. But
its home.
It was his home. It wasn’t supposed to be, but it is. The years he had spent living there had passed by that
he did not recall using up 10 years alone in this cell.
There is no use.
The man punches the wall. CRACK. He might have broken his hand, but he laughs hysterically. Laughs,
and yet the laughter died and tears were again welcomed. He lies upon the floor, Just this once, let me be
weak. He cries for himself, he cries for his room, he cries for his sister.
Time passed by. He is not aware how long. But he stands up, sniffs and wiped off the tears. He walks unto
the bars and yelled, ‘BOB! BOB! WAKE UP! GIVE ME PAPER AND A PEN, COME ON.’
Bob, fat with grease stricken beard, jerks up awake and stares around him searching for the source of
noise. He leans in and zeroes in on the man and answered, ‘WAT’CHU WAKE ME FOR?’
‘I need a pen and paper Bob. That is all I ask. I have the right to.’
‘Yah sure datz wat yah want? For your last? A pen and a paper?’
The man merely nods. Bob shrugs and searched his desk for a pen and paper. He pushes the half-eaten
sandwich. ‘Dats for later’. He walks, or rather, wobbles through the cells and gives the man what he
wanted.
“WAT’CHU USE DAT FOR?”
“It’s for her Bob.”
“Aye, I get it man. Just. Just. I want yah teh know that yer were…are a good man.”
“Thanks Bob. You’re lazy but you’re good too. Take care of the family ok?”

“YES. Yes. No need ter be lecturin’ me on dat. Get on with it” Bob walks away as the man was still
watching him leave. Bob pauses. Takes a deep breath and stares at the man with tear filled eyes. “HEY
MAN!”
“Yes, Bob?”
“I JUST. I’ll give dat ter her meself. I promise.”
The man, shocked still. Stares into Bob’s eyes and sees sincerity. “Thanks Bob, that would be great.”
With that, Bob turns around and walks into his desk. He wipes the tears that fell. And yet, he could not
stop crying. He could not. He mourned for the man. He never knew his story. He never knew why he was
here. But through the years of watching him, Bob knew that the man did not deserve the punishment he
got.

CHAPTER 2: THE LAST HOURS
The man hears Bob’s soft sobs. Why? He asks himself. Why does he so? There is no reason to.

The man shakes his head, no. He probably feels sad for losing a friend. Friend. Another luxury he lost
while in here. First, a sister. Now, a friend.
“I’ll miss you too Bob. You’re a good guy.” The man chuckles weakly to himself.
He looks upon the window, and sees light. It’s almost time. He smiles weakly. He hurriedly sits upon his
bed and clutches the paper.
What would I say? Do I have any right to say anything to her? After what I did?
I have to. I have to tell her the truth. I deserve to be listened. After all, being listened to is the last wish I
have for her.
He looks at the paper, and with shaking hands, he starts to write. With shaking hands, he will be listened
to. Finally.

Miles away, in the city of Huntington, far away from the grieving man, a woman, curly haired with bright
green eyes, heart-shaped face and sweet smile walks into a boutique.
“Welcome!” She chirped as she flips the store sign ‘Open’.
Hours pass and the woman greeted a couple of really stubborn customers. A smile here and there fixes
everything though. As she sold everything for today, she decided to close the shop. As she closes the door,
an officer places his foot to stop the door from shutting.
“Oops! Sorry!”
“Its okay Ma’am. That’s what I normally get from putting my foot in your way. Apologies mam. But, I
have to remind you of your schedule for 4 pm?” the officer said.
“Yes, yes. How can I forget. Thank you officer.”
The woman looks unto the retreating officer and with a final wave closes the door and leaves. She walks
to her home with a dazed look into her eyes. Its today. I have…..she checks her watch….3 hours.
Three hours to face him after all this years. Silent tears fall from her eyes and she sniffs. No, he doesn’t
deserve this. He has NO right for these tears.
Angrily, she opens the door to her unit and leans against the door with a heavy puff of air. Her home. This
was not supposed to be her home, but it has to be. She doesn’t have anywhere else to go to. This was what
that day left her with. A lonely home. A home where no one else has stayed in for years but her. The home
that shouldn’t be.
She paces back and forth. I have to go there. To finally finish this.
She clutters over her stuff and prepares for him.
Him.

That man who broke everything for her.
The one who destroyed her family.

The man folds up the letter. After a few pages, his hand could not take another stroke of sentences and his
heart, his heart could only take so much scars. He seals it and looks at his masterpiece. Who would have
known that much of the truth lies on meagre pages of paper? The truth, etched upon simple inks of pen,
that never saw the light of day condemning him of 10 years of prison until today.
Keys rattle and Bob stand on the entrance of his cell. He looks at the man with pity. Pity for what is to
come. And yet, Bob saw the man smiled. He smiled. Bob almost breaks down from where he stands. He
could never understand the courage this man must have mustered to conjure a simple smile. He smiled.
Bob smiled back.
“Ey, yer ‘ave a visiter.”
“Who is it Bob? Today? Of all the days, today?”
Bob shrugs but he knows that who the man is about to see would bring joy and great sadness for the man.
“Iz her man. Iz her.”
The man freezes. His shaking hands stands still upon his lap as he gawks at Bob. No, he must be joking.
The man’s smile fades and tears form. I never thought she’d…..she’d actually… Huffing a loud puff of
air, he brings back his smile.
“Really Bob? Its her? Wow, well, let’s not make her wait for too long.” The man says as he passes Bob
and proceeds to the visitor’s area.
Bob gazes at the man. He ignores the smile for he knows the eyes tell the truth. The man’s eyes were wet
from unshed tears and the man’s hands were shaking as he clutches the letter. “Ey man, wan’ me the hold
on the dat for yeh?” he asks softly.
“Huh? What? Oh. No Bob. Thanks for the offer, but I think I have to give her this myself.” The man
answers distractedly. He gazes upon the steel door that separated him from her. He thinks of so many
things to say and yet nothing seemed right. Should he say hello and ask how she was? Or Should he be
silent and let her start the conversation?
Or should he apologize first and beg? Beg for what?
Bob buzzes the door and pushes the man inside and ushers the guard outside. “Let em ‘ave their privacy.”
The man, blinded by the bright light from the numerous windows this room has, covers his eyes. Then he
looks for her. There. There she was. After all this years. There she was. She looks so much like mom.

The man walks toward her as she continues to stare at him. He notices her crossed arms. She’s still afraid
of me. After all I’ve gone through, it is her who’s afraid.

The woman stares up at him. Its him. He looks so much like dad. Tears well up her eyes and yet she could
not afford to allow THIS man see me fear him.
“Hello brother.” She greeted icily.
“Hi baby sis”
“DON’T CALL ME THAT!” she yelled.
“Okay Okay. Can’t we just…just…sit down and talk? As you can see, its my last.”
She freezes. She knew that but it never dawned on her that it is his last. She always imagined him here
locked up and doing whatever scums like him do. Happiness should swell in her and yet, a tear escape her
eyes.
“Don’t cry, come on. You’re big bro’s still here right?”
“I’M NOT CRYING. THESE ARE TEARS OF HAPPINESS BECAUSE A B*STARD LIKE YOU WILL BE
GONE!”
The man looks at her and smiled. She froze again. Why must he smile?
“Well, sis, it’s great that you’re happy. That was what I wanted all this while. So how are you?”
The woman breaks down her guard and shrugs. “So-so”
“Okay” The man says slowly. “So-So? I guess that’s…..good.”
“Well, it’s better than Dad now, you know we buried him right, because of you?” the woman sent sharp
looks unto the man.
The man’s smile faltered. He he felt a pang of hatred, deep hatred toward their father.
“You still think I killed him?” the man asks with a sad smile.
“YES! RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME! YOU KILLED HIM! BECAUSE OF YOU I HAVE NO FAMILY!”
“What do you think I am? A friend?” The man chuckles.
“YOU DARE MAKE A JOKE OUT OF IT? HOW DARE YOU! I LOST A FATHER.”
“You think you’re the only one who lost a father?”
She glares at her brother. How dare he say that he lost a father? “You took father away from me, and dad
was all I had and you killed him.” She states a matter-of-factly.

He grows quiet. She smirks. “Yes, you see what you took from me? All of it?”
He looks up at her, in tears, “That’s how you still see me huh? After everything is said to you, you never
listened. You never believed me. I lost a father but I lost him years before you lost him.”
She looks at him and sees sincerity. She grows quiet.
“You never listened to me did you? We were the only ones left and you never believed me? You believed
everyone else BUT me.” The man continued on.
“I saw you kill him. You deserved this. You deserve to die today. You know what, I will be looking right
through the glass as they execute you today. I will be looking real hard and smile at your fate.”
The man chuckled. “Good thing I could not see you.”
She screamed, “HOW DARE YOU LAUGH?!” She cried. She could not stare at those cold eyes anymore.
Her brother, he was once her hero; the one who would beat up the kids making fun of her. He was the
only person there for her more than anyone else. How did it come to this?
She covers her eyes, refusing to let weakness show. The man grabs her hand. She swipes them away but
he held on. The man caresses her hands, stroking them like he did whenever she felt sad. She cried harder.
The man cries silently, muffling his sobs through his hand while caressing his sister. He looks up the time.
3:30 pm. It’s almost time.
He does not let go of her hand but stands up and kisses the back of her head. “Read this for me okay? My
last wish. Read this for me.” He hands her the letter, squeezes her hand and stood up. He mutters softly,
“I always loved you, you should at least know that. It was all for you.” with that he left.
The woman cried and squeezed the letter hard. No. She could not see him like that. She would not be able
to bear seeing the light in his eyes leave. No. It’s too much. She stood up and left. Never looking back,
clutching the letter as hard as she could, she left her brother for the last time.

CHAPTER 3: THE LETTER
4:30 pm
Dearest sis,
You hate me right? I know why don’t worry. You have the right to. You became fatherless because
of what I did. I was punished from that, I suffered in this prison more so than anyone else for I am
innocent. I am. You might not think me so but I am. For 10 years it was that truth that pushed me from
insanity. I strived to live even though I knew there was nothing left for me to hold on to. You hated me,
our parents died, one at my hand, the other at the hands of God. I was alone you see, more alone that you
might think. I may be surrounded by people in this place but my heart yearns for the justice I deserve.
The one thing holding unto me in this world is that when the day comes that the court finally
decides to end my poor excuse of an existence, I would be able to tell you the truth. I never imagined that
you would see me anyway. I don’t deserve to be visited I know. But I wished for it. God, how much I
wished to see your face, the face that pushed me on hoping that one day I might be free and the truth may
finally be told.
But I received the judgement. I am to die at 4 in the afternoon today and you still did not know
the truth. I could not bring myself to death while you live your life hating me, after all, I am the only
living relative you have.
Sis, that day, the day you found father lying on the floor was the day I thought would bring
prosper to our lives. But you were too young to understand that, but you understood enough to think that
it was my fault that our father died. I never blamed you. I never blamed you for thinking that, I never
blamed you when you testified against me in court, a young girl, standing up on that podium telling the
tale of how her big brother, her supposed hero killed her only father. I never blamed you, I blamed myself
for everything. But it was worth it.
That was what pushed me to do it you see, it was worth it. Until my dying day, it is worth it. If I
could offer you the best years to come without our ba*tard of a father then my suffering is worth it. His
death is justified by the future I lay for you. You are older than you were then, you are not the young girl I
saw crying and screaming at me anymore and one day, when you read this letter, I hope that you will
listen as you have never listened to me before. I am not asking you to believe what I say but I am hoping
that my truth is enough to be listened to.
You see for years, our father failed everything. The business failed, and we grew broke if not for
our mother’s money. We were struggling to live on. Remember the time when you asked our father for the
toy he promised you and he said that he forgot it at work and the days after that you would remind him to
bring it home, but when a week passed you grew tired of waiting and cried for days? Dad hit mom that
day out of pure frustration, and may be jealousy. I was too young to understand what was happening but I
knew it will be one of his firsts.
You were always his angel, you never saw him for what he truly was and maybe that was why he
loved you more than he did mom. You were his princess and that is the only thing I thank him for. But
whenever he fails to bring you home something you wanted, he would sulk and beat our mom. I was a

teen back then, and I would pick you up and hide in the closet and play your princess’ music so you
wouldn’t hear her cries. I blame myself for not protecting you both. I could have but I chose you.
One day, he got home drunk and you greeted him with your own sweet smile and he hugged you
and said pretty stuff while he ordered me to buy more drinks for him. I was never beaten you see, because
I take care of you since our mom was always bruised and battered. But this time, mom was too tired to
even move, I kept asking her to go to the hospital but she would not let me, saying that she was fine. I was
too young to understand the whole situation. So it was up to me to fix the house and take care of you at
the same time before dad goes home. But I failed. It was my greatest failure. I failed a simple task and it
led to something worse. When you greeted dad, he saw how filthy you were and blamed me, that was
perfectly fine for me but he blamed mom for the filthy house.
I decided to stand up to him and tell him that it was all my fault but he ignored me and beat mom.
Mom was crying hysterically and begging him to stop because I could see everything. You hid in the close
tlike I asked you to and I punched him. In his drunken state he whirled at me and beat me up much worse
than he did mom. I did not cry little sis. That much I am proud of. I never shed a tear. After he was done
with both of us, I crawled to mom and asked her to leave with us. She said, “I cant, we have nowhere to
go”. But she had money, why not? I argued. She said, as much as she wanted to leave, he treats us kindly
enough and loves you too much. “But mom, he hit me too! He might hit her soon enough” She answered
“He won’t”.
I was too weak to even argue more but since then I learned to take as much blows I oculd have so
he would not have any energy anymore for mom. Remember when you asked why my eyes were swollen
and I told you it’s because I fought Spidyman’s villain? And you laughed? That was one of the best
memories I have left. I lost my father those days. I lost him and he stole mom from me. From us. Mom
could only take so much. She was strong, you must always remember that. But she was also weak for us,
always for us. She loved us too much that she was scared of what father will do if she left. Eventually she
left, not willingly, Father pushed her. No one saw it. Only I did. And I was too scared to tell anyone about
it, who would believe me?
Mom was gone and all I had is you. I became stronger for us. He lacked someone to beat
therefore I was scared that he would soon turn to you. I would hide you from him so that whenever he
needed to cool his head off, there was always me. Only me. My bruises are enough. I did not need you to
see what a monster our father was.
The day you found him lying dead on the floor, he turned to you. Do you remember? You were
hiding in the closet. I was distracting him from your room and yet he needed another punching bag. I told
him, “Aren’t I enough!?” and he punched me. He was so close to you sis. So close. I had no choice but
hurt him. I hid a knife beside the closet you were hiding, far beyond your reach, and stabbed him. It was
self-defence from all the years of pain he put mom through, and yet you opened the closet and screamed
when you see me hurt him. I tried to calm you but I too was shocked at what I did.
Since that day, I lived my life in peace, I lied in my cell at peace knowing that I did what I thought
was best. You blamed me for everything and I never told you the truth, not because I did not want to but
because you refused to listen. You would not even look at me. The hurt in your eyes was enough for me to
shut up and take the judgement they lay upon me.

I will never blame you. You are innocent. You have loved him as a daughter would and I refused
to take that love away from you. That in a way, was my fault However; this day has to come that my truth,
the real truth has to be told. I hope you would believe me but reading this will suffice.
Today. Right now. I might be gone, but you must know this. I love you. I have always loved you
little sis. Everything was for you and I would like for you to one day realize that all I ever did was become
the best big brother I hoped you would have. I failed to be with you for years but remember you were
always in my heart.

You are the light in my darkness.
Loving you forever,
Robert, ‘Big Bro’

THE END